The Day I Got My Finger Stuck Up My Nose Poem by Brian Patten

The Day I Got My Finger Stuck Up My Nose

Rating: 4.3

When I got my finger stuck up my nose
I went to a doctor, who said,
"Nothing like this has happened before,
We will have to chop off your head."

"It's only my finger stuck up my nose,
It's only my finger!" I said.
"I see what it is," the doctor replied,
"But we'll still have to chop off your head."

He went to the cabinet and took out an axe.
I watched with considerable dread.
"But it's only my finger stuck up my nose.
It's only a finger!" I said.

"Perhaps we can yank it out with a hook
Tied to some surgical thread.
Maybe we can try that," he replied
"Rather than chop off your head."

"I'm never going to pick it again.
I've now learned my lesson," I said.
"I won't stick my finger up my nose -
I'll stick it in my ear instead."

Malavika Venkat 15 November 2005

This poem is really funny! U shud really enjoy it! it ROXX!

5 8 Reply
Sehasa De silva 22 May 2018

It’s very funny and I really like this app

1 0 Reply
Tom Allport 15 October 2017

Hi Brian, I hope you don't mind I was inspired to paint an image that came into my head from this poem I have given it the title Dilemma. It will exhibited in the Now Looking At It art exhibition at The Rathbone Gallery Birkenhead until Christmas 2017. The exhibition is a 50 year celebration of the poetry book The Mersey wishes

4 1 Reply
Tom Allport 30 July 2017

a brilliantly funny poem that made me LOL, at the things we do for fun? ...................wonderfully written BP.

1 4 Reply
Kim Barney 02 February 2015

Another funny poem, almost as good as the spelling one.

3 2 Reply
Anong All 16 November 2005

Very creative.., and quite funny too...! With Respect, Jodilee

5 7 Reply
Brian Patten

Brian Patten

Liverpool / England
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