Tormented Love

Rating: 3.0

my thoughts of you are never said
they are only spoken by me in my head
i think of you every day
i can never find the right words to say
i just want to tell you, you're my love
and you're as precious to me as a dove
but i know we will never be
because i know you will never see
what i have come to be...


C M 10 August 2006

love this one... another it's to late now to ever know what you had...

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Rebecca Wright 02 April 2006

so sad. you need a hug : D hehe (or maybe a pizza hut balloon!) x

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Ernestine Northover 12 March 2006

Another good write Adam, but make sure your spelling is perfect, as this effects the way one reads it. For instance you have 'your' when it should be 'you're' or 'you are'. Also 'precious' is badly spelt, and makes one hesitate working out what it is supposed to be, which stems the flow of the poem. Hope this is helpful to you. Love Ernestine XXX

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Anna Russell 09 March 2006

Sad and beautiful. I would maybe change 'And I can never find the right words to say' to 'Can never find the words to say' just to keep the rhythm going. Also try not to rhyme dove and love - it's been done too many times. This is good though, whatever you decide to do with it. Hugs Anna xxx

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