Grand Theft Auto Poem by Kim Barney

I've never told this tale before;
not sure if I should now.
It was a foolish thing for sure;
I'll tell it anyhow.

This happened sometime in the spring;
I was away at school,
a college town not far from home;
it had a swimming pool.

I had this friend that I'll call Burt;
he was a Dodger fan.
His father was his greatest pal,
a very friendly man.

We met this other guy called Dave
who lived just 'round the bend.
We got to know him well enough
that soon he was our friend.

How Burt found out, I do not know,
but this is just bizarre:
the key to his dad's Pontiac
fit David's little car!

We used to move his car around;
we thought that was great fun.
He'd leave it sitting in the shade
and find it in the sun!

He didn't know that it was us
that moved his car about.
He always wondered what went on,
but never did find out!

Then came the day Burt said to me:
"Hey, Pal, I need a ride
from here as far as Gunnison,
which Davey can provide."

I had my doubts, but soon agreed;
in Dave's car off we went.
We knew he was in class just then,
and so his gas we spent.

I took Burt down to Gunnison
to honor his request,
but coming back, I hit a snag
that put me to the test!

Five miles from town, the car broke down
and I was set afoot.
I had to hitchhike fifteen miles
and felt like a galoot.

Before I left the car I took
the shirt right off my back
and used it to wipe fingerprints
so we would leave no track.

I made it back, to my relief,
and found Dave full of sorrow.
I didn't think myself a thief;
my purpose was to borrow!

His car was found before too long,
and was repaired with ease.
Some wire was loose; that's what was wrong;
no need for expertise.

For Burt and me, that was the end;
we took Dave's car no more.
Had we been caught, our new-found friend
would really have been sore!