Grandmother's Old Armchair Poem by Kim Barney

My grandmother, she, at the age of eighty-three,
one day in May was taken ill and died;
and after she was dead the will of course was read
by a lawyer as we all stood side by side.
To my brother, it was found, she had left a hundred pound,
the same unto my sister, I declare;
but when it came to me, the lawyer said, "I see
she has left to you her old armchair."

Chorus:

How they tittered, how they chaffed,
How my brother and sister laughed
when they heard the lawyer declare
Granny'd only left to me her old armchair.

I thought it hardly fair, still I said I did not care,
and in the evening took the chair away.
My brother at me laughed, the lawyer at me chaffed,
and said, "It will come useful, John, some day
when you settle down in life, find some girl to be your wife,
you'll find it very handy, I declare;
on a cold and frosty night, when the fire is burning bright,
you can sit in your old armchair."

What the lawyer said was true, for in a year or two,
strange to say, I settled down in married life.
I first a girl did court and then the ring I bought,
took her to church, and then she was my wife.
Now the dear girl and me are as happy as can be,
and when my work is over, I declare
I ne'er abroad would roam, but each night I'd stay at home,
and be seated in my old armchair.

One night the chair fell down. When I picked it up I found
the seat had fallen out upon the floor,
and there before my eyes I saw to my surprise,
a lot of notes, ten thousand pounds or more.
When my brother heard of this, the poor fellow, I confess,
went nearly wild with rage and tore his hair,
but I only laughed at him, and I said unto him: "Jim,
don't you wish you had the old armchair? "

No more they twittered, no more they chaffed,
no more my brother and sister laughed,
when they heard the lawyer declare
Granny'd only left to me her old armchair.


(Author Unknown)