His Smile An Unknown Mystery Poem by Yulissa Fregoso

His Smile An Unknown Mystery

Rating: 5.0
 


As i walked past you your smile
Lighted my day becuase
On a bad day you suddenly
Make it a wonderful day
And an awsome day your smile makes it
An excellent day thats why your smile is so
Riduclously dirving me crazy why nobody nows becuse
Love is a mystery and mystery is unkown and it will always be
Unkown

COMMENTS OF THE POEM
Jeff Pua 05 April 2010

Smiles truly can brighten other people's day.. I like this..

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masked lady 01 January 2010

Hi Yulissa! i love your poem. I can feel it comes straight from the heart.

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John Knight 25 October 2009

Hi Yulissa - Your poems are so so lovely. I like the structure of this one and it has a nice rythm and a nice flow - easy to recite - I score it MAX. When writing poetry SPELLING and GRAMMAR are of paramount importance - I have tweeked it to rectify some minor mistakes - ask your English Teacher to go through it with you. The content of all your poems is excellent As I walked past your smile It lit up my day because........... On a bad day you suddenly Make it a wonderful day And an awesome day - Your smile makes it - An excellent day - that why Your smile is driving me so ridiculously crazy! Why? - Nobody knows because.............. Love is a mystery - love is unknown Love will always be UNKNOWN. I have only made a few minor alterations to improve the flow! Love you in Poetry - JOHN.

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