Impasse! Poem by Shahzia Batool


Rating: 4.2

I offer prayers
to God Almighty
renew the promise
of my soul
at every smallest
sin of life
repent, atone
and daily sign
the deal with devils
then ask forgiveness,
mercy sweet,
then daily gain
some fatal apple,
and daily lose my Paradise!

Save us please God!
as the fall of Man is not the incident of history only, it is the daily occurence, moment by moment, some or the other man falls from the state of Grace, and consequently one or the other paradise is lost! ! !
David Wood 17 May 2013

To err is human but to forgive is divine. A lovely poem.

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The very definition of the 'Paradise' has to be revised. Though as a poet you have full liberty to renew your promise to made to 'God', I would like to know whether it is man`s fault alone to be in this impasse? A new strain has been added to man`s miserable struggle since B.C 18000 when modern man began his different mission of life on a planet that would have just spun like any other planet for ever.. Good human beings still survive and that is why this paradise is still habitable for most of us. The slaves know how to toil and Master may not. Please, take it light as my atheistic mindset has urged me to write like this.

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S.zaynab Kamoonpuri 22 May 2013

Ah coment not going!

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Valsa George 14 May 2013

Such a wonderful piece of a poem! This is human predicament! ! We fall, but falling is no sin as long as we strive to get up! God is all love and all forgiveness. He will atone our sins, provided we are repentant! !

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Captain Cur 16 May 2013

Most sins are sins of thought not deeds. The temptation lies in our heart which is vulnerable to conflicting and destructive emotions. Your poem is simple in structure but powerful in message. The ending word paradise elegantly picks up the off rhyme in, daily sign, which ends with great effect.

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Amitava Sur 07 February 2014

Sinning in human life is like the apple of Eve, with this we have to live...... very well written

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Passionate Reader 25 May 2013

to err is human... we are human beings and not angels who would never commit a sin but it is always important to ask forgiveness from God! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! a very thoughtful poem, infact a prayer! ! ! you are blessed with a quality that enables you to communicate true feelings! ! ! God bless you.

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Farah Ilyas 22 May 2013

what a confeesional poem! verily one who ask for forgiveness Allah grant them what they want....fatal apple, again reminds us we are becoming victim of devil one way or another, only God protect us; holy poem, glad to see it

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Indira Babbellapati 22 May 2013

I look forward to the day we mortals are freed from the concept of sin...

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S.zaynab Kamoonpuri 22 May 2013

Ok tryin again. I said, brill creative how u say, fatal apple, true d darned forbiden fruit dat still lures man. Kudos behna.

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