***mommy, Don'T Leave Me Just Yet! *** Poem by mimzy sue
***mommy, Don'T Leave Me Just Yet! ***
She was young, beautiful and happy
She was her daddy's pride
She, a good daughter
And her daddy finds for her a husband
She was a good wife
A good mother
But He left her....
She wonders why? ? , but never got her answer.
There, with her Hungry Kids
All alone
Having no roofed upon her head
And no place to go..
She wanders
Tired and weary
Everybody hushed and felt sorry for her
But no one Helped her! !
But She was a survivor
She was so naive and vulnerable
Yet so strong and fought the world
For her kids to fit in
She often lied about her watery eyes
Something entered into hers eyes,
But secretly I know
Those were tears
Sacrificed her life
Gave her all for her kids
But never complained
And never asked for anything, anything..........! ! !
But Will she survived this
horrible, dreadful disease
I'm so scared she would'nt
Who is strong enough, anyway? ?
I wished that I could fight for her
Could give her something she wants...
Time, oh! time we all need.....
I wished that time never exists.
She linger on,
But I know this waiting will end someday
It can't lasts forever...
But mommy don't leave me just yet.....! !
No, Mommy won't leave you! If I do, I wish I shouldn't be born INTO THIS WORLD! ! ! ! Touching piece! !
A very nice piece of work in the world of poetry.Do keep on writin for us to learn from you too.Bye. Edward Kofi Louis
covert of love to own kids and die for them... Sacrificed her life Gave her all for her kids But never complained And never asked for anything, anything..........! ! !
i must say this poem is very deep written very good job keep up the good work btw check out my new poems plz and thank you
This poem comes from somewhere very deep. It is an honest, passionate and very moving plea from a daughter to her ailing mother. The reader feels your pain and joins you in your words of supplication - 'Mommy, Don't leave me just yet' loe, Allie ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
This poem has a nice title, but many of the lines are much too obvious. You are using imagery in your poetry, but it is weak because it isn't using imagery through FIGURATIVE LANGUAGE. Figurative language is the meat of a poem, it is what keeps the reader's eyes on the path of the next lines. The poem about the struggling mother is a subject that has been overdone very much. You want your poem to stand out more. Use metaphors, similes, sounds, anything. Everyone knows 'watery eyes' means 'tears'. Try something spicy like 'dewed lashes' or something else. I cannot connect to this poem because it's structure is too rigid, too predictable. Add surprises to it. Play with the lines. Be bold, don't be afraid. Don't get into the habit of creating obvious cookie cutter poems. This kills the art.
The heart-pull of poignance is finely displayed, here...Structurally smooth write, through your employment of tight, crisp linage....(3rd stanza...''roofed should be ''roof''') Otherwise...Solid Work, young lady. *F j R*
that poem was very touchy i like it a lot keep up the good work
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
Delivering Poems Around The World
Poems are the property of their respective owners. All information has been reproduced here for educational and informational purposes to benefit site visitors, and is provided at no charge...
12/5/2025 6:45:49 PM # 1.0.0
Beautifully sad and tender.Thanks.Kev