North Carolina Vs. Duke Poem by Kim Barney

Last night was the long-awaited first meeting
this year between basketball powerhouse
universities North Carolina and Duke.

Duke was rated number one in the country
and playing on their home court.
Carolina was rated number eight.

ESPN had a two-hour pregame program
to hype the event. Celebrities present at the game
included Spike Lee, Ken Griffey Jr, and Barack Obama.

Much of the pregame talk was focused on Zion Williamson,
outstanding Duke freshman center, who many
sportscasters consider perhaps the best player ever.

Williamson has intimidated many players near the hoop,
and when they dare to bring the ball inside the paint,
quite often their shots end up getting blocked.

Thirty-six seconds into the game, Williamson slipped
on the court. His Nike shoe came apart, the blue sole
separating at the seam from the white top.

As his left shoe sort of exploded, his right knee
twisted and he crumbled to the floor in pain.
He left the game and did not return.

After Zion's left shoe blew up, Carolina blew up Duke.
The Game of the Year was no contest at all.
North Carolina scored at will inside the paint.

Carolina's first twenty-two points were scored
on ten dunks or lay-ups and two free throws.
Duke couldn't seem to buy a basket.

The Blue Devils kept throwing up three-point attempts.
Most of them bounced off the rim. Few connected.
Duke's home-court advantage proved to be worthless.

So poor Zion is out, sad but true,
and we don't know what Duke's going to do.
Well, I've got some advice,
and they shouldn't think twice:
Sue the shoe! Sue the shoe! SUE THE SHOE!