Remind Me Poem by Nel Omofolarin

Remind Me

Rating: 4.5

Remind me
Of promises, i left unkept
Lest i kindle a rage that burns beyond my age
Remind me
Of solemn creed, i betrayed
Lest i kindle an inferno that ruins beyond my lineage
Petty forgetfulness, sadly often preys
On even prettier memoirs of firmest pledges
And roasts happy relationships to sad ashes of its own enmity
Unfortunate, how we got caught in this crossfire!
Sad! how sweet friends became sour foes!
Yet, i have moved from joyous adolescent witlessness
To moral maturity of a more meaningful adulthood
As i ascend to descend giddy hill of age
So, before living beats of my evanescent heart pale into sober silence
Kindly indulge me, in a moment of peace
Cup your begrudging heart, let me pour in honest apologies
Forgive me, of my paranoid years
Which gave birth to seasons of violation of trust
And a deathknell to our already dying friendship
Even if we are never going to be friends again
Let's not just be enemies!
For my pledge for years after I am gone
Is to leave this amiable plains more peaceful, than I met it
Though I be no perfect man
Yet, let my little inevitable imperfections
Inspire my world to a more perfect place, than i met it

Allotey Abossey 10 August 2015

I enjoyed the read. Good work friend. Stay blessed

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Nel Omofolarin 14 August 2015


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Clarence Prince 03 August 2015

Forgive me, of my paranoid years, Though I be no perfect man, Remind me Yes, we all need a reminder some time! Well done, Nel!

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Edward Kofi Louis 28 July 2015

Sad! How sweet firends became sour foes! Nice piece of work with the muse of life.

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Fabrizio Frosini 28 July 2015

Dear Nel, I see you've followed Bri Edwards suggestions.. good, now the meaning of those lines is more clear. Your poetry is an interesting one and this poem as well, with a very good imagery, even if you have to pay more attention in the construction of the sentences. For us (me too, as an Italian) who are not native English speakers, it is not so easy to translate in proper English the exact sense of our thoughts, but surely you're on the right track

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Bri Edwards 27 July 2015

unkempt or unkept? ? both good words but not both good here. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Pretty forgetfulness ............ pretty as in quite, OR petty? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - memoirs or memories? - - - - - - Memoir (from French: mémoire: memoria, meaning memory or reminiscence) , is a literary nonfiction genre. More specifically, it is a collection of memories that an individual writes about moments or events, both public or private that took place in the subject's life. ================================== and again.......... prettier? not sure what you mean by pretty and prettier - - - - - - - - - - - - - i especially like these lines: So, before living beats of my evanescent heart pale into sober silence Kindly indulge me, in a moment of peace ....... though evanescent is another 'new word' to me! Search Results ev·a·nes·cent ˌevəˈnes(ə) nt/ adjective literary adjective: evanescent soon passing out of sight, memory, or existence; quickly fading or disappearing. a shimmering evanescent bubble synonyms: vanishing, fading, evaporating, melting away, disappearing; ephemeral, fleeting, short-lived, short-term, transitory, transient, fugitive, temporary operating on an evanescent budget antonyms: permanent Physics denoting a field or wave that extends into a region where it cannot propagate and whose amplitude therefore decreases with distance. ==================================== well a nail could cause death, but perhaps you mean death knell (which i misspelled as nell) ? Search Results death knell noun noun: death knell; plural noun: death knells; noun: deathknell; plural noun: deathknells the tolling of a bell to mark someone's death. used to refer to the imminent destruction or failure of something. the chaos may sound the death knell for the peace plan - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Inspires my world to a perfect place, than i met it i suggest Inspire and ..... a more perfect.... you have some interesting thoughts here. one or two places are a bit unclear (to me) . you could make this into two or three poems easily, expanding on different aspects of it. but not bad. not bad at all. bri :) thanks for sharing.

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Nel Omofolarin 29 July 2015

Edwards...I am grateful for your helpful comment knitted in friendly corrections...thanks

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