I am so torn.
I want to spend every remaining moment with you,
But I do not want to watch you die.
At turns, I leave the room
Before coming back to sit at your bedside.
While away, I distract myself
With music, a book, or a telephone call
Only to return, and hover over you.
You have lucid moments; at others you are absent.
I continue my pacing from room to room.
Finally, from the kitchen, I hear
The last agonized gasp of breath
Before peace, and release.
Slowly I enter the room
And cautiously approach the bed.
Your hands and feet are cold,
But your torso and the bed are still warm.
I can feel your presence still here with me.
I bury my face in your chest,
And sob, raw tears.
This brought back memories of when I lost my partner a few a couple of years ago, so I know where you're coming from. Many of my star based poems are in his memory.
Would you believe that this particular poem is totally fictitious, Alison? The only resemblance to reality is a slight one to when my Mum was struggling with whether to stay, or to leave us. I DID process my emotions by pouring out 3 poems within 24 hours of when my fiance' passed away, but (at present) I consider those poems too personal to share on a worldwide site. I am so sorry for your loss. Grief is only an indicator of how deeply we loved the person. I shall have to check out some of your star-based poems!
This is what you feel And this is what you wrote. Pain was fully described and present, felt and understood, the most difficult moments. The final parting. The hurt, way deep inside, way deep inside, I cried.
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
The saddest time of all: when someone we love is slowly dying. You brilliantly blend true life with fiction-not all of a poem has to be true, but I don't like inventing too much either. You have exactly the right balance.
Thank you for the compliment, Michael. Striking the right balance is like walking a tightrope- - You don't want so much fiction that it sounds fake, or as though you don't know what you're talking about. But embellishments can make for a more interesting and gripping read.