The Rejection Slip Poem by Rev. Dr. A. Jacob Hassler
The Rejection Slip
all would-be poets, take note!
proofread that so-called poem you just wrote!
those who aspire for more Famous Days
please steer clear of these clichés:
so what if your heart
beats,
leaps,
bleeds,
weeps,
throbs,
breaks,
soars,
aches,
cries
sighs
skips,
or dies?
hearts are ever in a state of perpetual disrepair
we don’t need you to tell us
who cares if your soul
tears,
flips,
fades,
rips,
shimmers,
dances,
glistens,
prances,
bounces,
flounces,
shivers,
or trounces?
souls are soiled and sold in bars and airports everywhere
we don’t need you to tell us
we already know the world is
small,
doomed,
cruel,
entombed,
spoiled,
alone,
frigid,
a stone,
squeezed,
diseased,
dismantled,
displeased
the world is a brutal desert, mercilessly fallow
we don’t need you to tell us
don’t go on about how your poetry
moves,
sways,
dives,
plays,
hates,
doesn’t,
is,
wasn’t,
entreats
defeats
scores,
then retreats
the very art itself is narcissistically shallow
we don’t need you to prove it
all would be poets, take heed!
before you publish your crap to read,
consider these guidelines lest they be your death
by wasted ink, wasted pages, wasted hours, wasted breath!
But the REAL question is: Do we need YOU to tell us any of this? I for one am slipping my rejection slip for you under your door. You can mark on it with your red felt pen. Please consider my remarks here as tongue-in-cheek as yours were meant to be. H
you both remind me of Statler & Waldorf...only they were funnier. warmly, AJH
Very creative, creating a poem consisting of what should not be in one. Intresting angle.
All I can say is 'amen.' So true. So true. That said, YOUR poem affected me profoundly.
Excellent poem! I think I'd rather get a rejection slip than a rejected organ. - chuck
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
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4/18/2025 5:49:24 AM # 1.0.0
Bloody brilliant, will stock up on highlighter pens for my own very painful howlers: -)