Uncontrollable Thoughts.

This feeling overpowers me, overwhelming, and unavoidable, like the dark of night.
Its always there, but sometimes hides within me.
I feel as if it must be a part of me, like its necessary, like the day and night.
The days pass me blankly, as I stare into my possibly non-existing future, it shadows me, hides me.
It will never go away, theres nothing to stop it, maybe I want this, maybe I do, maybe it'll happen, sometime soon.
I browse, look, search, pray for the everlasting answer that will end this for good, for eternity.
Frightened of failure and pain, I withdraw from attempting.
I hope to god, that it is enough to save me, because pain and failure are the only things keeping me alive.