You Left Me! (Parody On 'Drinking Makes Me Miss You…' By Kim Wilkins) Poem by Konstantin Ananin

You Left Me! (Parody On 'Drinking Makes Me Miss You…' By Kim Wilkins)

You left me! The only friend
That could always help me to stand
Any sorrow or pain.
How could you break the chain
Connecting us ten years?
This tiny room we’d shared
Became empty and cold
After your leaving. No!
I can’t believe! You’re here,
Hiding! I’ll find you dear!
Stop! Castles in the air!
Overcome despair!
But how? I wanna ask,
“Where are you, my dear flask? ”

Kim Wagener 26 September 2008

the twist at the end is fantastic, really unpredictable. i liked your repeated exclamations, like a panic. good work

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Ha, it's great. It sounds like someone has an alcohol addiction. Your poem twists and turns. Just when you think you have it figured out, bang! You see you don't. you did excellent work.

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Ivor Hogg 31 January 2009

Vodka with a twist of lemon Beautifully done

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i love the twist you made in this poem... thanks for sharing

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a heartfelt poem thanks for sharing

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Greenwolfe 1962 17 October 2008

I graded it a 7 , but I would give it a nine if the structure were different. You have written a two stanza piece. It is in only one stanza. My preference, however, would be to keep it in one stanza. When you transition into the lines of exclamation. I would simply present each line separately down the page. It is a very unconventional thing to do. However, you have written an unconventional piece excellantly. If you can separate each exclamation line, the reader will appreciate each line. This should give this work much acclaim among readers. It will clarify what you have written, and add to the appreciation of the readers. GW62

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