There once was an elderly golfer,
Who played every day on the greens,
What would he do in heaven?
When his time was finally played?
He tried to seek out the answer,
Deciding to ask those on high,
So he sought out the local vicar,
A man all knowing and kind.
Our Vicar did not know the answer,
But vowed would find out somehow,
Which left our elderly golfer,
Contented to play on for now.
On a day that our elderly golfer,
Having a pot of tea with his mates,
Saw the vicar claiming attention,
To convey to our golfer his fate.
He announced with some trepidation,
That the news was both good then bad,
But our golfer, keen for the answer,
Said “give me the good news my man”.
“There are golf clubs aplenty in heaven,
With wide fairways and very flat greens,
Where the hole are as big as tea plates,
And no bunkers will ever be seen”.