A Coffin To The Lady And A Breath To The Lover Poem by Rania Hammoud
A Coffin To The Lady And A Breath To The Lover
You had never meant a thing to the striken heart
And all the years past she has been pretending
It's not 'cause she liked to be a hypocrite
Never did she want to be cunning
It's not a matter of greediness, selfishness, not a love art
Not a propensity to be a queen who in hearts chooses dwelling
Bad news! With no return, your heart she'll depart
Don't show her your dreaming eyes now stunning
Woe! A thunderbolt her confessions to a lonely solace
He thought to be in the lady's presence lasting
Hard luck! For the lady had turned to her cottage, left a splendid palace
He died to drag an interpretation of her but salient was her tarrying
No teardrops he saw! No blooddrops! No voice came out! Alas!
Nothing but a statue she was, he hit, slapped and heard no speaking
He cried her not to forsake his heart in her he put his affiance!
Deafness in ears is what only replied! He mourned, screamed and got nothing
Left in torture! With no answer and no justification he carries
She had gone and not justified the crime plus an introduction not convincing
Shall he pray to her to dwell in peace?
Shall he forgive her for the dramatic ending?
Shall he crush her beneath his feet? or pray God to ease
her sufferings? Would this heal something? would this bring to the broken heart blessings?
Shall he burn the Body and gobble the ashes? shall he her veins squeeze?
Or say forgiven by me though her pretensiousness all the time to be loving?
For the shock! He had done nothing, then came the breeze
Proffering the lady a coffin and a breath to the lover to help departing
Hi Rania - you have chosen an interesting structure for this poem with a very interesting title. It consists of 13 couplets each one of which takes us further and further down a path of despair - degradation and destruction as befits the title. For the structure (there is also a consistent rhyming pattern) and content I score it a TEN. V 1 Delusion snd pretence V 2 Hypocracy and cunning V 3 Explanation V 4 Bad news! She will depart V 5 Woe! Confession and rejection V 6 Hard luck! The lady has departed. V 7 The lady becomes silent and insensitive V 8 Dumb insolence and rejection V 9 Left in torture - She has gone - no answer - No justification V 10 Shall he forgive? or V 11 Shall he crush? or V 12 Shall he burn? V 13 'For the shock! He had done nothing (which is sometimes worse than doing something) - then came the breeze - proffering the lady a coffin -and a breath to the lover - to help departing'. Not a very pleasant out come. Sometimes we destroy be neglect and indifference. Love you in Poetry - JOHN
This is kind of embarising, but at much as I enjoy reading this poem, I don't understand it.
Rania it's a splendid poem i like the title, the thoughts and the way you write there is a big connection in every verse about that dramatic poetry scene you are a very powerful poetess keep on to another good work 10+++
i'm totaly impressed ! ! it's a dramatic story told through lines of true feelings.. every life has its own bitter moments, but POETRY can make it better.. Bravo, Rania & thanks4sharing this ! !
I like this poesy) >< great one/ nice interpretation! ! !
amazing work........................everysentece has a wonderful meaning..
Thoughtfully woven title...true to the depictions inside...beautiful!
wonderfully worded. it show the spiritual torture well.
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
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4/25/2024 3:03:53 AM # 1.0.0.1119
great poem, well done 10+