Last summer I had opened the windows over the bed
To let in the night's breeze;
But air too still drugged me to deep sleep,
Smothering me under its dead-weight heat.
I awakened with a heavy body upon me,
With the stench of a stranger's hand upon my mouth,
And a drunken breath whispering gutturally in my ear:
Knife-prodded, it took me a minute longer
To awaken to the fact that those demands
Were from an unknown intruder
Who wouldn't take "no" for an answer
Despite how strongly delivered.
With my tongue the terror tried to speak,
Though I denied it my full-throated scream.
Later with words I appeased it,
Coating fear with chewy intellect
So that my mind and jaws kept busy
While the terror melted,
Receded to the back of my throat
And enthroned upon a tightly strung larynx,
Waited for the right breath to give it life.
I can feel it like an itch -
An urge to gag, I guard each breath
And learn to defeat it with swallows.
Tangled there in sinew, the fear remains
Unspoken, but drains me of any complete release.
Now with so many words between the act
And the stifled reaction,
I see how my mind bargained for time to absorb
What the body had to receive and accept in the moment.
And now with my tongue the terror finally speaks.
oh my Lilian, this is so unimaginable but through your words I felt it and it brought me to tears...but it's the last line that really tore me a apart because I know that feeling....
that's a very sensitive issue handled with deft touches by the poet.
I applaud you for the courage to write about such a terrible experience. I commend you for writing it so well. God bless you Ron
The way the harrowing experience is recounted… most haunting….the terror is felt real.. great poetry..
To awaken to the fact that those demands Were from an unknown intruder Who wouldn't take no for an answer Despite how strongly delivered.- the terror finally speaks .. wonderful dear poetess. such a cruel act.. beasts of brutality in live.. they are so many here on earth....... when can mankind conquer this evil. is there a way.? ? tony
Is it a drama in real life or reel life? Whatever may be it but a Master Stroke…Vital-Hit to heat up anybody. Enjoyed poetically [not violence] much ten dr.sakti Cordially invite to read and comment on my poems.
The third stanza of this poem is apt for the study of MIND BODY BEHAVIOUR, the last frontier in the human serach to know self. Lilian you have surpassed the boundaries of the intelligible - coating fear with chewy intellect - and moved into the recesses of the human person which we can feel - I can feel it like an itch - but not know. I know we are to extract good from evil, no matter how heinous.and this work shows this magnificently - can we show evil magnificently; that is an oxymoron, but that's poetry. .
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
This poem is powerful and shocking. The terror; 'an urge to gag, I guard each breath/ And learn to defeat it with swallows' is all too tangible. The rawness and attempted rationale of this horrendous 'aftermath' is evident in every carefully chosen line. A poem that smacks of realism. This emotive, adeptly written piece will haunt the reader long after the final word. S: (