Fieldglasses Poem by Tan Pratonix
Fieldglasses
Suppose I was living on the bank of a river
Where ladies occasionally would come for a ride
In a boat with a friend or relative or lover;
And under the trees (all cosy inside,
I'd be watching their movements through a pair of fieldglasses)
Sometimes, when she reached for a fruit in the leaves,
Her skirt would ride up more than a couple of inches
For a refreshing glimpse of her thighs and her knees.
Then may be her lover, if he's Puritan-minded,
Would bashfully turn both his eyes to his oars;
But others, of course, are much more inclined to
Follow the techniques of Di Vitti Amore.
Meanwhile I would sip from a bottle of champagne
Or sometimes, I'd look up M. Bewick on birds;
There's an interesting book on African campaigns
By Field Marshal Montgomery; and Richard the Third
Is suitably Shakesperian to civilize habits
Like looking at rivers through glasses; the fields
Are alive in springtime with frolicking rabbits,
And amorous birds in billowy trees.
Is suitably Shakesperian, NICE LINE, ...........................
Very interesting and fun poem.You've spent quiet some time on this and it has paid off.Love Duncan
No wonder you wanted me to read your work, you write with humor and I love it. I shall read a lot more of your work. Cheers Sylvie.
Now this is a delightful poem, Tan. It evokes those lazy afternoons and reminds me of a Seurat painting on the banks of the Seine. A little inspection of pretty ladies and a good book to read. Mind you I avoid Richard 111 because of Shakespeare's calumny against our last true monarch. You must start writing again, my friend.
Your rhymes are impeccable. You are an Olympian writer. (Keep writing. The world's your oyster.)
Wonderful, Tan, particularly in view of your age at the time. May the Muse be reawakened. Don
Fascinating write Tan. I never know what to say when I really like a poem. But your imagery is awesome and the poem is in tight form. Well written. Red
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
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12/6/2025 5:47:57 PM # 1.0.0
Your established meter goes to pieces in these ending lines: 'Meanwhile I would sip from a bottle of champagne' 'There's an interesting book on African campaigns' 'Flowers, lovers, and birds rustling the green leaves.' It is of course possible to change rhythm in a poem, but it must serve the music, and here, it doesn't. The sentiments expressed are appropriate for a lad 17-19 years old, and these are less obsessed and freer-minded than one might expect, but the poem's light-hearted mood throws a greater burden on the quality of the music, which needs to be perfect for this to succeed.