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Bhaswat Chakraborty
Moonlight - Poem by Bhaswat Chakraborty
The passage from cradle to grave
A voyage of sheer consciousness
Some make it with laugh and fun
Some make it a total mess
Childhood and tender youth
For everyone, these times are naïve
Innocence reins, simplicity prevails
Always vibrant always alive
It is the adult who feels the burden –
The right and wrong and do n don’t
This is where you either make it
Or you have not lessons learnt
Success often gets the ticket
To get to go to the life’s choir
To love, to serve, to sing along
To climb the ladder higher n higher
“You’re a winner”, existence whispers
The life force serenades you
You look around in sweet raptures
You feel good about what you do
And if you did have a tougher luck
Or if you did not have the smarts
The going can be topsy turvy
If you couldn’t figure life’s charts
They are the ones strive and struggle
Although my heart cries for ‘em
Unsung heroes and wasted loyals
Ordinary men devalued gems
Who applauds and who does care
Who celebrates these wretched souls
Nothing quite works for them
Bereft of feats bereft of goals
For some the delight easily comes
They float as they get it right
Other, happiness rarely earns
After a toil or even moonlight
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very creative poem you made (Report)Reply
thank you for the invitation. i like how you analyze human emotions in this poem.
I especially like these two stanzas:
You’re a winner”, existence whispers
The life force serenades you
You look around in sweet raptures
You feel good about what you do
For some the delight easily comes
They float as they get it right
Other, happiness rarely earns
After a toil or even moonlight
I am very big on positive poems. you really bring out the positive in these stanzas. but one thing: I didn't get why you called the poem moonlight.
i like the poem but there are some weak elements to it your form is great but no rhyming patterm more like a open or free verse. ... (Report)Reply
Good observations and reflections in the poem.
Good words of compassion, consolation and credit to unsung, unappreciated efforts.
Regards,
Vanita. (Report)Reply
i agree with shashandra...my fav line is 'you are a winner, existense whispers... (Report)Reply
living our lives is very important because if we dont live our lives then who well. I love this peom specially the title. (Report)Reply
A very nice piece of work. Thanks for sharing it with us.
Edward kofi Louis. (Report)Reply
Well thought out and put together.. (Report)Reply
Very unique.
Nicely written: ]
10++ from me! ! (Report)Reply
oh! ! ! ! this is an inspirational rite indeed...specially for the budding youth sir...please invite some young people to read this one...
'You’re a winner”, existence whispers
The life force serenades you
You look around in sweet raptures
You feel good about what you do
And if you did have a tougher luck
Or if you did not have the smarts
The going can be topsy turvy
If you couldn’t figure life’s charts'
people in this site make me feel better, when i was feeling down and out...now i m sort of a okay....hey yet now that i m caught in university work..hard to come to site like i used to do...but still do! ! ! ! ..to read such words of wisdom, and encouragement! ! ! ! !
great write10+++
regards
shan (Report)Reply
Yes, you are right, for some success comes easily and life seems very gentle on them and some just 'strive and struggle'. But then the meaning of success also varies. A quote attributed to Ralph Waldo Emerson says, 'Success is to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.' (Report)Reply
Moonlight walker sees the path of life in stages.............Oh! the poet's vision is unique.
Good luck Bhaswat! (Report)Reply
''For some the delight easily comes
They float as they get it right
Other, happiness rarely earns
After a toil or even moonlight ''
the message of the poem is to be good and do good, believe in a good conscience and respect the worthiness of the individual and the ethics of life....wonderful poem...10++ (Report)Reply
good write very good (Report)Reply
a lovely drift through varies stages and attitude towards life...finally not knowing what is this sucess.....nicely written (Report)Reply
nice composition you penned on moonlight. (Report)Reply
The passage from womb to tomb takes one to the destination after so many trials in life sucessfully met. A free flow of words. (Report)Reply
well penned............thought provoking (Report)Reply
Dear Bhaswat,
Thanks for sharing such a sublime rhetoric on life from beginning to end in a freeflow of rhymes.There are numerous lines which will attract the attention of readers.I like your firrst two lines most:
'The passage from cradle to grave
A voyage of sheer conciousness'
Good poem attracts good rating A-10- FROM ME.By the way youhaven't perhaps gone thru any of my poems. Why not find some spare time to comment and rate on any
poem of your choice e, g, ALIENATION, EASEL, BONSAI, , BLACKOUT-Rajkumar (Report)Reply
Well thought through. Take care on mixing contempory and formal expressions I found some distracting. (Report)Reply
Excellent poem, good rythem. (Report)Reply