Amy Ormonde
<font color= red>Nancy, France

Pleasure Was No Sympathy

Rating: 5.0
I was quiet in the corner
He whispered in my ear
'come closer'
I could feel something begin to race
My heart
as it began to swell and violently pace

He picked me up
then sat me down
on the edge of my bed
I began looking around

I was fearing at first
as to what we may do

and then he walked back into the room

His angelic face
pearing down at me
touching me gently
as though to swoo me

Hey laid me back
kissing softly
I could feel temptation
as my heart bethrough me

He began to arouse me gently
and softly
as though to know what it was I had wanted

as he caressed
I could feel the pleasure
all through me

watching in silence
he knew what to do to me

as slowly as we had began
our clothes where off
and we had sinned

he was watching in enjoyment
amazed by all his poise

and then he laid on top of me
and I began to moan

Pleasure was no sympathy
as I am glad at what he did to me

and i laid there in his arms
he said ' I love you'
and I was gone
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Ben Gieske 05 August 2009
This is one of your more successful poetic efforts. It is well phrased in most parts with a good rhythm and gradually builds to a climax. Also your use of rhymes is creative in some parts and provokes a definite sensation relying heavily on a drawn out sound.
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my golly gosh.........
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Kyle Jones 23 June 2009
From the first few lines you could just feel the blood rising, descriptive and desperate, while this type of poem has been done before it is, without a doubt a style that never ceases to enthrall and enchant it's readers
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