You make words and they immortal
you are trying to adjust this world in a bottle
and you are penning so beautifully days
i have a little words outnumbering your praise
you are tied in a great white ribbon
i just give a gentle push to free you from this prision,
and make you feel that you are not alone
i too cry darling for someone who is now gone
i think of you even when my mind is in dream
and am making our love shining using fair cream
you write so vividely do you get your talent hire
but listen baby your a poem has put me on fire.
Because when desire speaks it burn the hearts, heat of fire that never equal...when someone steal you as a lover_Soul
Beautiful Vishal, and so sorry for my late coming. Keep it up, your feeling in sensual and full of emotions. Your expression is so true, need more images and colorful metaphors but don't overdo it. One way to do it is using the simple daily things so your reader don't even notice anything usual until they finish your poem. Repeat words with the same meanings to put it on notice on fire. I don't follow any rule, never read a book on poetry or rules of poetry, just read a few poems on this site to realize, yes, I belong here and I can contribute! I really don't like to comment on poetry because I think is of poor taste and because I love you all. Every poem except the vulgar or hate I love, all. I will be your faithful follower for days or months to come, I don't know for how long my resource runs out. it is a mission right now, but hopefully it is not endless. Peace,
you are tied in a great white ribbon. lovely thought. nice imagery
Thank you Vishal. A beautiful poem of good sense with rhythm and rhyme.
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
nice rhyming verse good to read