Becoming

Rating: 4.9

It was dark,
I was immersed in a fluid world,
so small within its depths.

Beyond the boundary, muffled sounds
soft and tender, could be heard.
Sighs, laughter, and I longed to see from where they came,
yearning for sight to penetrate opaque lids.

But all that could be seen were shadows -

shadows,
like phantoms drifting through a sea of calm.

In the distance could be heard a hypnotic tick tick tick,
marking time it seemed -

my time, here, within.

But what of time:
was there a beginning, or an end?

Suspended in peaceful unknowing,
I was rocked, by the gentle sway of my world,
into a silent slumber.

All was well in this universe,
where quiet waves licked against unseen shores.

But there was a storm unfolding.

A turbulence began to envelop me;
I was surrounded with its torment
- undulating, seizing, pushing -
and I felt the first pangs of fear
pulsating through my being.

Then, bewildered and disgruntled,
I emerged from the darkness,
kicking and screaming

into the light.

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COMMENTS OF THE POEM
Kevin Halls 23 May 2013

Like a previous poem of yours Val I had to go back over it again, and then I got the Eureka moment! I like your new style of writing on this poem and it has made it more intriguing too. Nice one.

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R.j. Wynn 22 May 2013

Ahso, Kicking and screaming,10/4

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fist stanza about being in womb (It was dark, I was immersed in a fluid world, so small within its depths) as relatives and parents wait baby moves and kicks and finally into the light / here a great message in simple way life it self find the way from darkness to light /please come from darkness to light / lovely poem Valerie deserve 10

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Dave Walker 21 May 2013

A really fantastic poem, a great build up to a fantastic ending.

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Shahzia Batool 21 May 2013

A finest construction for the prcision and depth of images in the strong feminist context!

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Excellent poem. Well written with great detail. Enjoyed.

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The gift of life is here portrayed with insight and realism!

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Heather Wilkins 19 June 2013

nice entrance into the light. well written piece of poetry

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Danny Draper 12 June 2013

Oh to be born, our rare and solemn gift of life and its most unlikely occurrence, beautifully portrayed.

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R.benjamin Abate 07 June 2013

This is powerful. The words sort of fell off the page for me, nice flow. I especially enjoy the ending.

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