Dr Hitesh Sheth
Constipation - Poem by Dr Hitesh Sheth
An urban teacher recently transferred to a rural school
Had complaint of, ‘Inability to pass his stool’.
His wife thought, “Husband may be speaking lie
Let me take him to Freud- City’s sexiest guy.”
Freud boasted, “I can cure this illness in fifty sittings
But since it is an emergency, I will call psychiatrist’s meeting”.
He decided to call psychiatrist all
And they gathered in a big conference hall.
Freud started, “Pt is fixated at phallic stage
And harbors suppressed sex and repressed rage.”
Karl Jung shouted angrily at Sigmund Freud
“You always bring sexuality, Are you Freud or fraud? ”
Then he mocked at Freud, “Do you have brain or bladder
You cannot diagnose even a simple matter”.
Sigmund Freud confessed, “You all know I am sexually perverted
But you also know, personality cannot be reverted.”
Then he added shyly, “Phallus comes in my mind uppermost
When I see pen, pendulum, pillar or post.”
Then Jung added, “It is a simple case of fight
Between a conscious complex and an unconscious archetype.”
Anna Freud said to Jung, “You are speaking in jest
Otherwise go east or west my father is best.”
Alfed Adler said, “I can see with clarity,
It is an obvious case of organ inferiority.”
Maslow interrupted, “Pt has problem in climbing a pyramid
So please give him some push from behind.”
“It is ‘birth trauma’ blurted out ‘A Man in Black’”
When all look on their back, it was Otto Rank.
Adolf Meyer said, “There is no need to guess
It is a simple case of, ‘reaction to life stress’”.
“Basic Anxiety” Karen Horney spoke anxiously
But as usual no one took her seriously.
Briquet guessed, “It is a conversion disorder and secondary gain
There is no pain without gain”
Erickson said- flashing his mobile Ericsson-
“It is a problem of stage transition.”
Heinz Kohut said, “Pt is not getting job satisfaction,
Because he is not getting ‘narcissistic gratification’.”
“It is an adjustment disorder”, spoke SHETH HITESH
Everyone look at him with interest.
Pt said, “You all fool, Don’t loss your cool
I’m not passing stool, because there is no latrine in the school.”
Dr Hitesh C Sheth
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