Hey Proselytizer! Poem by Professor Poetry Hound

Sometimes I wonder how you have the audacity to
present yourself to us. There you are with your

clunky, scuffed black shoes, your black polyester
pants that are 4 inches too short, your stained white

shirt (How on earth did you get yellow stains on it
– is that from the cat?) , sitting in your dilapidated house

with crumbling shingles falling off the roof and ratty
old duct tape covering cracks in the windowpanes.

And you’re going to tell ME how to lead my life?
I thought of something more productive you can do to

glorify His name. Here’s what you should do. Haul that
rusty washing machine in your front yard on over to the

county landfill. You might also want to get rid of those
old tires in the backyard with weeds growing up through

them. Frankly, I’m rather astonished that you would
conveniently forget that cleanliness is next to godliness.