His Royal Highness: Tktwbh....[long; Humor; Fantasy; Tktwbh] Poem by Bri Edwards

His Royal Highness: Tktwbh....[long; Humor; Fantasy; Tktwbh]

Rating: 5.0


This MAY be a dull tribute to a self-important Dude.
That's 'dude', not 'duke'..... Good gracious! I'll TRY not to be rude.
After all He really is a King, though with Him I may disagree.
He begged me not to be cruel to Him, and for that I'll get BIG fee.

(Yes, Big just like His Head!)


I've read at least one of His poems on the site PoemHunter.
BUT if poets were football teammates, I'd be the quarterback, and He the punter.
He claims He's Most-Wealthy; that could be said of many pricks.
I wonder sometimes what it really is inside His Big Head that ticks.

(A bomb?)


Now you readers may not ALL have heard His silly claims.
Why, He thinks He is more beautiful than other men and EVEN 'other DAMES'!
Of course I've never seen Him; He's got NO PHOTO on the site.
To me there seems something not kosher here..... I'll bet he looks a fright.

(Thanks for sparing us, King.)


He claims birds fly to his palace, to just stare...., and Him adore.
I'll bet those birds are vultures, their minds all filled with gore.
I'd bet He'd not even make them a decent meal; (I believe He's VERY skinny) .
And I'll bet when horses look at Him, the sight makes them all whinny.

(HIS mother wouldn't do that. Or MAYBE she would? H'mm.)


Now maybe I should tone it down a bit; I really need that fee!
But if I really believed He DESERVES so much praise, I'd write His Praises FREE!

(Donations are accepted, to me that is, readers.)


He says He has someone else PEE for Him. That's what He SAYS...... I think He's full of shit....
Well, I guess I can't control my words. Goodbye fat fee. That's it.

He tells me He dwells in a palace. I think perhaps in a lowly cell.
I'll bet His hair has dandruff, and exudes an awful smell.
His attire, perhaps ONCE regal, I'm sure hangs from Him in tatters.
He told me He put his parents in the Tower, to have control over all their matters.
(Good Grief!)
By 'matters' I'm sure He meant their money, and their EXTENSIVE lands.
But I'll bet Mom and Dad sensed His plotting, and put HIM in jailor's hands.
And though He has claimed all mirrors turn toward Him, and reflect His every whim,
I'd guess His cell's walls are covered with mirrors..., just to torture Him.

(the wages of His misbehavior)


I've SUDDENLY realized that, while writing this, I continue to capitalize His Name.
I think He's got me partly brainwashed; I may never be the same.
I truly for a while believed in all His claimed beauty and great wealth.
Probably all The 'King' NOW DOES HAAVE is hunger and poor health.

(Poor Baby)


I guess what really did GALL me and drove me to this unfortunate route,
is that He thought His poems were better than MINE. What a Dirty Lout.

(Well maybe He KNEW in His Heart that I am the superior poet; He just could not admit it;
He has such a Big Head/'Swollen Head'! ! ! ! You CAN'T believe Him. REALLY.)


He'd even talked of 'allowing' applications, filled out for those who would be His queen.
I think about all He could come-up-with, NOW, is King Kong, from movie screen.


He claimed to have authored....more than just one famous book.
I know now 'the books' was another lie. You doubt ME? Just you take a look.

(He probably can't even read or write and has 'someone else' do those for Him!)


AND not long ago I'd asked Him if He had a sister...., pretty as well as slim.
At the time I still was fooled...., and I thought 'I'll make a Brother-In-Law out of Him.'

(He answered that He had no siblings, as He was the firstborn... AND He was ALL His parents could ever have hoped for. // In REALITY they probably wished they could return Him. BUT they didn't know 'where' He had come from. They didn't DARE try another baby. Personally i don't blame them.)


But now that He's in a dungeon, (I'm sure) , and I should ask His mom and dad......if they have a 'suitable' daughter, or niece, for me; this should make them VERY glad.

(Of course I won't be picky as long as I get in the family.)

I wouldn't mind living in their palace and having some coins to spend.
I could probably write more about ME, but I'm sorry readers. THE END



(Nov.2012)

POET'S NOTES ABOUT THE POEM
PROBABLY TKTWBH (that is the name He goes by: The King That Was Big Head) is REALLY a Poor British Postal Clerk in a dingy backroom in some forgotten postal station. it is probably there, when no one is looking, that He submits His pitifully small and, in general, pitiful poems He dares to offer us. what an offering! ! ! (they are a little funny, but don't tell Him i said so)
COMMENTS OF THE POEM
Muzahidul Reza 18 December 2017

Through out the the poem His Royal Highness humor, fun, fantasy, emotion, ambition, ....... are seen in outstanding composition, thank you dear poet, for sharing the poem with us, AND not long ago I'd asked Him if He had a sister...., pretty as well as slim. At the time I still was fooled...., and I thought 'I'll make a Brother-In-Law out of Him.' enjoyed much

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Simone Inez Harriman 23 March 2017

Your'e a king of comedy Bri. Packed with a myriad of lighthearted hilarious images. Yet sobering to never underestimate the power of a disgruntled postal worker. Very interesting what we imagine a person to look like, by the written word or sound of the voice especially if we are attracted or repelled by.

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Bri Edwards

Bri Edwards

Earth, i believe
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