Mary Nagy

Rookie (11-08-1970)

Learning To Love - Poem by Mary Nagy

How do I learn to love myself
when love was never shown?
It's hard to look in a mirror
when that face is not my own.

I know the ''What you should do'' 's
and the ''You know what is right'' 's
but that won't help me while I try
to win this losing fight.

I always have to force it
to say I'm worth that much.
I have to make myself believe
that I deserve his touch.

It's easy to say ''Do it''.
It's harder when it's you.
I have to work at it each day
and night the whole way through.

How do I learn to love myself
when love was never shown?
I think I better take the time
or I'll end up alone.

Comments about Learning To Love by Mary Nagy

  • (3/29/2006 12:44:00 PM)

    The trouble with using a mirror Mary, is that you only see a limited side of yourself and then point out how many things you could change or would change if you were able.
    What you cannot see in the mirror is the soul.
    The eyes, they say, are windows to the soul.But on reflection, can not be seen clearly.
    You can only be seen clearly when you do not look into the mirror. Ask yourself this question, Do I have Love to give?
    If the answer is yes then you have seen your true reflection beyond the dought and insecurity that we all have.Look carefully Mary, for if I can see it from here, you must be able to see it also.Love Duncan
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  • (1/9/2006 4:25:00 PM)

    Well an interesting thought is this. If one doesnot love oneself it makes it a sinch to abide by the command -'love thy neighbour as thyself'. I think you and your poems are ok so love away! (Report) Reply

  • Cj Heck (10/18/2005 6:24:00 AM)

    Good for you, Mary - I find writing about hurtful feelings or situations is paramount to hours and hours of psychotherapy, a catharsis of sorts... and so much less expensive. We must get them out, and then let them go.
    Warmest regards,
    (Report) Reply

  • (10/18/2005 4:30:00 AM)

    honest, heart felt and gutsy. (Report) Reply

  • Alice Vedral Rivera (10/17/2005 3:33:00 PM)

    Mary - you express these feelings beautifully. A trick my husband taught me (to counteract the damage to my self esteem my alcoholic late ex caused) - whenever you hear these negative thoughts immediately say this: 'that is not true' and follow with the opposite positive thought (i.e. I deserve to be loved) . In the beginning it's difficult but soon you find that the negative thoughts show up less often.

    (Report) Reply

  • Ernestine Northover (10/17/2005 3:14:00 PM)

    It is very hard Mary, it took me a long time to think of myself as somone worthwhile, I always seemed to be the one left out of everything and then you think it's your own fault and that your not worthy. At my age now I don't have to prove anything to anybody, hopefully you'll feel the same way very soon. A lot of it is confidence in yourself, that can help no end. You'll make it I know it, you've got the 'pluck' needed. Chin up girl! Love Ernestine.XXX (Report) Reply

  • (10/17/2005 2:23:00 PM)

    Mary, I can so relate to your words here, beautifully written, as always, you take the reader into your heart, to feel as you do. Take care, Amanda. (Report) Reply

  • (10/17/2005 2:13:00 PM)

    Very well put, Mary. The sexual assault and domestic violence training has shown me that everyone is worthy of being loved....but it's a hugely missing component in many peoples lives....and it affects every area in human interaction. If we want to 'fix' our world, we have to start by fixing our families... (Report) Reply

  • (10/17/2005 1:39:00 PM)

    Maybe there is nothing more important than self-love, but it seems impossible to learn but I'm certain you have more than earned it, Mary. (Report) Reply

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Poem Submitted: Monday, October 17, 2005

Poem Edited: Friday, January 5, 2007

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