Like Sentries (Plus Tanka Version Dedicated To Nora Olmedo) Poem by Sonya Florentino

I prefer the spare, elegant imagery of the original version. 'frayed afternoon' is especially compelling. As always, Sandra

A mundane observation turned wonderfully into multidimensional poetry and then dedicated to a respected and humble poetess, well done Sonya! Love and Regards, Naseer

I like the Tanka version better than the original! Ruthy: -)

Winged sentinels? ................

A superb and strangely reassuring image. I adore the 'frayed afternoon' of the final line - I've had a few of those! S ;)

Both are very well-crafted, beautiful images. I guess I prefer the tanka by a little, because it gives it more context, it sets up a certain expectation that it certainly delivers. Now I'm going to have to get acquainted with Nora Olmeda's work.

Sonya, I love both versions of your delicate write. I agree with Sandra, the original one takes me a bit 'higher' in its expression. A beautiful birdy poem, thanks for sharing :) Yelena M.

Both versions are nice Sonya, but I prefer the Tanka one....perhaps because I like the discipline of the syllable count and besides as Karin says it helps add to the meaning of the piece.....Nice tribute to Nora's poetic prowess...10+

Lovely to see your dedication to a fine poet Nora Olmedo. I prefer the Tanka Version as I feel the syllable count of Tanka gives the poem more substance and credence. However, if they were mine, I would be proud of them both Sonya. 10 love Karin

Hmmm, I like the spontanaeity of the first version, as if written in the moment. The second version feels more reflective. Again, great to see the same subject presented in different way - thanks Sonya.