I had a form to fill the other day
Which, when completed, could be said to be
An outline of my life. How carefully
I edited the story to portray
Apparent purpose, shaping facts so they
Would inter-lock and leave no hint of the
Long stretches, haunted by uncertainty,
That came between. Although I shouldn't say
So, when completed, I was qute impressed;
I seemed a person I'd be pleased to know.
Until I realised it was the rest -
The many failures that I didn't show,
The doubts and longings that I'd not confessed -
That, in the wilderness, had made me grow.
'Between the lines' is a poem, you could create a series from....it is a very matured poem with a compelling message of the many faces of people! !
This is a very heartfelt piece Mary. You breath life into the mundane so well.
How gripping and moving this tale is. Needless to say, our lives mirror that tale within. Loved it
However its structure..........this is a magnificent composition!
The content and message of this piece leave nothing to be desired, and the language is very natural. But using 'the' as a rhyme word and the line break ('although I shouldn't say / so') rather let it down. I haven't read all your PH works yet, but do you do anything else but sonnets? Perhaps there is a case here for writing this poem in a different form.
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
So true. Loved your poem.