By The Second Line Poem by Sonya Florentino

By The Second Line

Rating: 4.9


The drawing came back
Like a second line of a poem
My throat grew tight, chills
ran down my spine

I remember I was once
spellbound by a child’s drawing
of earth and sky... water and light
Her deft hands and inner eye
capturing dream and reality
the transparent duality
There in the surface of the lake
in that thin layer of reflection

The green in the trees, the blue in the sky
The gleam in the lake, the sun’s golden eye

The drawing was a poem
that awakened my heart
A déjà vu of sorts
A painting in verse
mirror a picture in words
Interchangeable
the vision
mine and hers
One and the same
both recognizing
that face without name

Same lake, same vision
A third eye’s inward reflection

I returned to the drawing in a flash
My eyes ripple life... my smile
Widening like the sky

* with much thanks to Ronald Peat for challenging me to re-write
'Spellbound' and to capture epiphanies

COMMENTS OF THE POEM
Susan Jarvis 29 August 2009

Sonya, this poem is truly beautiful and all of the wonderful comments reflect this. All I can add is that these words caught my eye and captured my heart: 'Her deft hands and inner eye /capturing dream and reality / the transparent duality'. This poem is a superb and admirable creation! S :)

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Laurie Hill 29 August 2009

Lovely thoughts and images are caused by your words.............

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Frank Lambert 30 August 2009

Hi Sonya, You've captured the moment with your words here and created a beautiful verse that made me want to read it again, and some more... Nice write. Frank

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R. H. Peat 30 August 2009

Nice write Sonya I almost feel this part I've cut ought to be your closure however. It could be dropped on the end of the poem and just let the space close in between. I think it would still be very readable and understandable without changing any words at all. Just a thought. A painting in verse mirror a picture in words Interchangeable the vision mine and hers One and the same both recognizing that face without name A poet friend RH Peat

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Sandra Fowler 30 August 2009

Who would not be spellbound by such luminous imagery? A poem painting of rare beauty. Exceptional, Sonya. Love, SandraX

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Lillian Thomas 08 November 2009

very very nice Sonya, I like it much better than the original Spellbound, esp. the ending it very strong. My favorite lines are the last two, though there are several others in a close second: 'My eyes ripple life... my smile Widening like the sky'

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Lorenzo Costigliolo 28 October 2009

interesting concept that inspiration transcends media - as one view becoming the personification of another - how music can inspire words, pictures inspire music (as in Moussorsky) and people inspire art (Mona Lisa) . Opens up old avenues of expression for new exploration.

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Samanyan Lakshminarayanan 18 October 2009

the imagery is class..a very good write sonya

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Reshma Ramesh 17 September 2009

beautiful................

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Ency Bearis 05 September 2009

a wonderful allegory poem....well written....10

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Sonya Florentino

Sonya Florentino

Manila, Philippines (residing NYC)
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