Annabel Cruz

Rookie - 169 Points (Havana, Cuba)

Concrete Spider - Poem by Annabel Cruz

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Up, up
The smooth and glassy surface of my shower
He crawled
His delicate spindly legs glued, as if by magic
To the slippery wall
Navigating rivers and waterfalls most blissfully
Until a random
splash of water washed him down

Down

Down

Down

Down

Into a huddled mass
Of tangled legs
Twitching, twitching
On the shower floor


Comments about Concrete Spider by Annabel Cruz

  • Jayatissa K. Liyanage (2/7/2016 9:51:00 PM)


    For the spider to huddle with tangled twitching legs...........? How did that thundering splash come on the itsy -bitsy spider.... Mr Poet? So much about it beneath those written lines, I feel. Thought provoking nicely written poem. Enjoyed. (Report) Reply

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  • Susan Williams (2/7/2016 3:53:00 PM)


    Quite descriptive of the itsy bitsy spider (Report) Reply

  • Godfrey Morris (2/7/2016 1:01:00 PM)


    Enjoyed reading. Thanks for sharing. (Report) Reply

  • Kim Barney (2/7/2016 10:22:00 AM)


    Life is so delicate and precarious. This poem is delicate and beautiful. Thanks for sharing and congrats on Poem of the Day! (Report) Reply

  • Souren Mondal (2/7/2016 7:50:00 AM)


    A very well crafted poem on minute observation... The imagery and the words are beautiful.. Thanks for sharing :) (Report) Reply

  • (2/7/2016 4:57:00 AM)


    Beautiful imagery and minute observation and their use in nicely crafted poem. Thanks for sharing.10 points. (Report) Reply

  • Edward Kofi Louis (2/7/2016 1:34:00 AM)


    To respect nature with things seen around you. Thanks for sharing. (Report) Reply

  • Brian Jani (7/14/2014 4:29:00 AM)


    this is q nice and simple piece of writing.spiders in our homes, natural insect control. (Report) Reply

  • Saadat Tahir (8/11/2012 12:33:00 AM)


    Nice lines... making a shower so extraordinary...
    People are so taken aback by a spider, anywhere near them...and you wrote a poem to do it justice.
    the twitching twitching... :)
    that’s what gives, us...ordinary mortals :) ……….the heebie jeebies

    liked yer lines
    cheers

    PS:
    here some fun on the score... :)
    Mallary Hope- Black Widow Spider (Jason Stephen's Winery) .....utube
    (Report) Reply

  • Adeline Foster (8/4/2012 1:24:00 PM)


    I too love shape poetry. To off-set the lines perhaps one could use.~`. Just a thought, even without it this is good.
    Adeline
    (Report) Reply

  • Juan Olivarez (5/24/2012 5:27:00 PM)


    I like it, experianced the same thing a few years ago. (Report) Reply

  • Unwritten Soul (5/13/2012 9:48:00 AM)


    Nice one! ! i like it....maybe it a tribute to spiderman too hahahaha :) nice write! _Unwritten Soul (Report) Reply

  • (4/17/2012 9:56:00 PM)


    ok.....it's supposed to look like a spider (hence, the title) , but PH won't let me off-set the lines: -( (Report) Reply

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Poem Submitted: Tuesday, April 17, 2012



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