Professor Poetry Hound

Concussions For Jesus

You know how when some people have
head injuries it changes their personalities?
Like sometimes they have recurring
hallucinations or weird thoughts. So I was
thinking we should impose mandatory
concussions for non-Christians. It just might
knock some sense into them about our Lord
Jesus. Hopefully, they’ll start having visions
and start believing Jesus is talking to them.
You’d probably want to accompany the
concussions with some biblically-biased
counseling so that when the non-Christians
complain about hallucinations or other
symptoms, you could say, “That’s Jesus
communicating with you, ” or “Jesus
WANTS you to have blurred vision.” For
the ones who remain resistant, repeated
concussions may be in order.

Poem Submitted: Monday, October 23, 2006
Poem Edited: Wednesday, October 27, 2010

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Comments about Concussions For Jesus by Professor Poetry Hound

  • Jemarie Ragudo (11/4/2007 9:54:00 PM)

    That's funny. But I believe Jesus recommended a less violent way of telling people how to do it. We have to talk the talk but we must also walk the talk. 'Kindness and love' is corny but it's the key.

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  • Chuck Audette (10/24/2006 1:27:00 PM)

    Can't we just dropp concussion bombs and do a mass conversion? (followed shortly thereafter with entry into heaven) . -chuck

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  • Danny Reynolds (10/23/2006 10:45:00 AM)

    Ever think you're just beating your head against a brick wall?
    That's Jesus too!
    Danny

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  • Anna Russell (10/23/2006 10:30:00 AM)

    Hand me the hammer!
    Hugs
    Anna xxx

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