adheez van der beanthz

Rookie - 42 Points (27 May 1980)

Dance Of The Rain - Poem by adheez van der beanthz

Stages of skies open
Its curtains is hope that be woven
Sown by the wind spirits
In the blessing of white expanses
When the skies metamorphosed to be gray
Lightning’s timpani reverberating
The eyes of thunder play
A silver silhouette that stunning
Sun on throne of it
Watched from a distance
Calm and authoritative
Give a sign to begin the event
A dance will be presented
Where the hope will be harvested
In the form of rain
Remove solitude and pain
The fairies play rhythm
About the beautiful songs of autumn
Water arrows race toward to the Earth
Like a mating dance of the paradise birds
Those arrows go down so swift
My body is wringing wet
Dust and dirt leave
Left a smile in my faith


Comments about Dance Of The Rain by adheez van der beanthz

  • Len Webster (1/18/2014 7:22:00 AM)

    This is potentially a first-rate poem but it does need some careful revision. For example, Line 2: Its curtains is hope that be woven.. (Report) Reply

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  • Len Webster (1/18/2014 7:20:00 AM)

    This is potentially a first-rate poem but it needs some careful adjustment. For example, Line 2: Its curtains is hope...? ? ? (Report) Reply

  • Msforever Lonley (12/9/2013 9:42:00 AM)

    i love the part about... the faries play rhythm about the beautiful songs of autumn. very inspiring i loved it (Report) Reply

  • Susan Lacovara (12/8/2013 4:35:00 PM)

    Refreshingly beautiful write...I could feel the lightness of the rain within your words. I especially like, Water arrows race towards the Earth... I was happy to be caught in the downpour of your lovely poem. I invite you to explore my poetry, as well. PEACE (Report) Reply

  • The Fallen Leaves Of Mira (11/27/2013 3:47:00 AM)

    You have a great mind and master the art of expression very well. (Report) Reply

  • Yasmin Khan (10/22/2013 12:18:00 PM)

    A profound poem about Nature and it's beautiful phenomenon, rain (Report) Reply

  • (10/2/2013 4:33:00 AM)

    Great imaginary inspired by mother nature! (Report) Reply

  • Cassandra Jasmine (9/24/2013 9:22:00 PM)

    Interesting, showy, and great! I gave it a 10. :) (Report) Reply

  • (9/21/2013 1:51:00 PM)

    That's wonderful when you say calm and authorative, and the imagery in your poem is awesome.
    Your get a ten out of ten.
    (Report) Reply

  • Geetha Jayakumar (9/19/2013 12:15:00 PM)

    Beautiful poem. You have captured rain very well..Enjoyed reading each lines.. (Report) Reply

  • (9/10/2013 9:29:00 PM)

    cool and gentle wish of the rain kick out your lines to remember forever, , , , God bless a 10/10 (Report) Reply

  • Heather Wilkins (9/1/2013 9:17:00 PM)

    nice writing rain is essential for nature to grow. nice rain dance (Report) Reply

  • Len Webster (8/28/2013 3:40:00 PM)

    Interesting piece of work with some original turns of phrase. (Might be worth your looking at it again in a few months' time to see if there are two or three things you still want to retain.) (Report) Reply

  • Lydia Martin (8/27/2013 1:21:00 PM)

    I love the imagery in this poem. Nice work (Report) Reply

  • (8/24/2013 8:46:00 AM)

    Yes, I can remember that event. Try Shower when you have a spare minute. Thanks. (Report) Reply

  • Beach Girl (8/22/2013 4:22:00 PM)

    Oh, that was just gorgeous! I gave it a 10 (Report) Reply

  • S. Nadia Azam Shah Bukhari (8/19/2013 6:55:00 AM)

    Wow! great. Very beautiful depiction of your thought and imaginations. So enchanted. (Report) Reply

  • (8/19/2013 6:33:00 AM)

    Wow Wow WoW! ! ! What wirite my friend! I really loved the way you have expressed. No twists, no turns and only beauty! (Report) Reply

  • Queeny Gona (8/19/2013 2:51:00 AM)

    Wow! The Utopian world of yours drenched me in web of beautiful imaginations.
    Harvesting faith in the form of Rain. Loved these lines.
    (Report) Reply

  • David Wood (8/16/2013 5:20:00 AM)

    We all need rain and some get it more than others but man is destroying nature causing it to rain out of season and acid rain to kill off the trees and forests. (Report) Reply

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Poem Submitted: Thursday, August 15, 2013

Poem Edited: Friday, August 16, 2013

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