Just A Pace Away Poem by Vaibhav Simha
Just A Pace Away
Myriad times have I witnessed men, grandiose and bold,
Who assert bliss is but slumbering atop mountains of gold.
They rush in obscure hours and toil for wealth's accumulation,
But little do they realise that it results in sorrowful ruination.
Is affluence truly the panacea to human suffering?
I've observed that it causes no more than the possessor's un-levelling.
Rest assured, this thought is but a shroud
That compels us to achieve the avaricious wants of the crowd.
What truly matters are your deeds of the day:
Your touches that heal, your thoughts that are blessed.
A mere smile over spectatorship on the poor who are, in reverence, addressed
Suffices to pale the sky's murky inauspicious grey.
Those jocund birds whose chirpings you enjoy,
Those splashes of the fishes swimming in a convoy,
Provide true succour and serenity to you
And lovingly aid you to share this bliss with your crew.
The air you inhale atop the highest peaks,
And the laving of azure water in the remotest creeks against your cheeks,
And the thought that the Blesser is in your confidence,
All elates you in true bliss, heralding yours and mine consonance.
Forget the precarious bonds with materialistic ecstasies
And find a haven, amidst the rapture of humble legacies.
There is no bliss miles and ages away;
Believe me, it is not a pace and day away.
(cont.) 2 - pale (as verb) : " 2.seem less impressive or important.” this is one word i was not sure of. i 'love' stanza 4 & first two lines of 5 " heralding yours and mine consonance." i’d use " your" and " my" OR “our”, but i may be wrong/incorrect. English varies from place to place and person to person and time period to time period and i'm NOT an expert! ! ! (cont.)
" Pale" (as a verb) is used here as a personification of the sky, which pales (as in changing its colour to white) the grey tone (objectification of impurity and sadness) . In a deeper sense, the sky can be take as the person's soul, which was impure before realizing the futility of avarice, but then it changes to white (a pure form) , for it is shocked upon the realization of truth (which is conveyed through the poem) . I hope you understand.
1 - glen: a secluded narrow valley ...what meaning are YOU using? " sorrowful ruination" ? in what form and for whom? maybe for the grandiose men, but maybe not. line 6: i'd delete " But" " Rest assured; this thought..." i'd replace semicolon with comma. WHAT thought do you refer to? stanza 3 is not so clearly written, i feel. (cont.)
It's true Vaibhav, sick of being in rat-trap.... everyone in his/lifetime tried to earn as wealth as possible without thinking about humanity... In wild run for wealth is wild goose chase when it comes to the contentment.
Great message beautifully conveyed....! Yes, true bliss is not something that lies outside, it is very much within and around....! One has to find it by oneself....! Peace and happiness is never in proportion to the material possessions one has.... in fact peace emanates not from material wealth but from inner wealth! Mature thoughts beyond your tender age! I have expressed the same idea in my poem Where Lies True Bliss! Top marks, Vaibhav.
The air you inhale atop the highest peaks, And the laving of azure water in the remotest creeks against your cheeks, And the thought that the Blesser is in your confidence, All elates you in true bliss, heralding yours and mine consonance Really wonderful rhyme. The thought provoking astonishing style is really great
An insightful philosophical reflection written in verse with rhythmic splendour. A work of an intricate mind. Thanks for sharing, Vaibhav.
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
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10/1/2023 8:01:42 PM # 1.0.0.1115
Girl you are superb
Imma boy! ! ! ! Thanks for the comment by the way.