Limerick Intro To A Bunch Of Tom Swifties Poem by Belle Wassermeister

Limerick Intro To A Bunch Of Tom Swifties

Rating: 5.0

There is something I need to confess:
I have learned quite a bit from Old Wes.
So enjoy each next verse,
some are better, some worse,
the first one, the second, and the res'.

(The first three are credited to Richard Stalker)

"The thermostat is set too high, " said Tom heatedly.
"The chimney is clogged, " said Tom fluently.
"Golly, that old man is bent over." said Tom stupidly.

(The next two by Jonathan M. House)

"I can't quite make up my mind about homosexuality, " said Tom, half in earnest.
"Necrophilia seems fine to me, " said Tom, in dead earnest.

(And these are winners of a Tom Swifty contest in the MINNEAPOLIS TRIBUNE)

"Let's gather up the rope, " Tom said coyly.
"I just ran over my father, " Tom said transparently.
"Don't you love sleeping outdoors? " Tom asked intently.
"Let's invite Greg and Gary, " Tom proposed gregariously.
"I've been stung, " Tom said waspishly.
"Here are my Tom Swifty entries, " Deb wrote submissively.
"I'm circulating a petition, " Anita Bryant said gaily.
"Let's trap that sick bird, " Tom said illegally.
"This boat leaks, " Tom said balefully.
"Welcome to my tomb, " Tom said cryptically.
"I just returned from Japan, " Tom said disorientedly.
"I lost my trousers, " Tom said expansively.
"I'll never stick my fist into the lion's cage again, " Tom said offhandedly.
"I can't find the oranges, " Tom said fruitlessly.
"Are you fond of venison? " Tom asked fawningly.

Monday, December 30, 2019
Topic(s) of this poem: silly
Wes Vogler has dozens of poems where he introduces Tom Swifties with a limerick. I don't have the patience nor the stamina to do them one at a time like that, so I thought I would share all these at once.

Which one do you like best?

December 30,2019
Kelly Kurt 30 December 2019

Great Limerick. Half in earnest Illicited the loudest chuckle.

7 0 Reply
Spock The Vegan 30 December 2019

I'll have to vote for " The chimney is clogged, " said Tom fluently.

7 0 Reply
Kim Barney 30 December 2019

Great collection of Tom Swifties, and also an excellent introductory limerick. Your rhyme on the fifth line is something like Wes would typically do! Most creative Swifty: the one about Greg and Gary.

8 0 Reply
Wes Vogler 30 December 2019

would not ... I'd of said And I giggled while c'llecting this mess

2 0
Leeann Azzopardi 30 December 2019

Bravo! this poem made my month I hope you'll be staying

8 0 Reply
Carl Roussell 30 December 2019

This is way too cool - I am definitely going to have to check out Wes Vogler. and by the way, I did like your poem

9 0 Reply
Belle Wassermeister

Belle Wassermeister

Gleichen, Alberta, Canada
Error Success