As darkness spread and the light was out
I stayed wide awake all through the night
To see where the sun went
And lay inside my tent
Then it DAWNED on me, it had set!
2 - I DO like the poem, and i laughed at the last line, in which " dawn" is used with two meanings i believe: 1 - mental recognition of something & 2 - the beginning of daylight to MyPoemList bri :)
Thank you for sending it to your poem list with all imperfections. I am justified by Aniruddha sir's comment..... " poets should have some freedom! "
I do not count the syllables while reading a limerick. If I can recite it well, and do get some fun at the end, I am satisfied. A good limerick, Valsa!
Beautiful poem on sunset." Then it DAWNED on me, it had set! "
This is a great limerick! Perfect construction and a funny closing that left with not only with a chuckle but with a very beautiful picture in my head! 10+++++++++++
Beautiful poem and thoughts in a poem, definitely this is one!
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
1 - i count " dawned" as one syllable. :) and i disagree, respectfully, with the rhyming, as i feel lines 3 & 4 rhyme well, but not 1,2, & 5. maybe i'm being too strict? ? in doing my online research it seems i'm talking about " rhyme structure" , when i thought it was " rhyme scheme" , which seems to be something else! ! ! i NEVER said i was a poetry expert!
Don't be so strict with your student.....! Yes, 'dawned' has only one syllable. Show some leniency. Many a time I have acknowledged that you are my teacher in the composition of limericks.......! !
As Aniruddha sir has rightly expressed, poets should have some freedom.......! !