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At The Pond

Rating: 3.2
As I looked around the pond
I see people playing in the snow
Laughing and throwing snowballs at each other
Making snow angles with great pride
Children sledding down the hill as if flying

As I look on the pond
I see people skating
Skating like soaring eagles
Twirling like tornadoes
But graceful as a ballerina dance

As I look around the pond
I see a people having fun
Enjoying themselves
Helping each other as if they were their little sister
I see a peaceful and fun world

But I
I am having no fun
No fun at all
For I am sitting on the bench
Sitting on the bench like a lost dog
For I am cripple
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COMMENTS
Adeline Foster 03 December 2008
Very good word pictures. Adeline
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Nice use of the senses and simile. Well written.
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Ashraful Musaddeq 13 September 2008
A nice poem with nice imagery, like it.
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Amber Lamb 26 July 2008
This a very nice write. You have a great amount of potential, Miss Cassy. Glad to enjoy the results of your efforts.
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, aryaindia 25 July 2008
The sadness and self pity and misfortune of one bereft of god given bounty is picturised in such dwelling words. I am sad. But I am sure god has not let you down...........he has given you the power to pen words......keep writing...you shall shine. arya
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Ben Gieske 18 July 2008
Aaron, you may be a cripple, but you are a good observer and poet. Good poetry does depend a great deal on observation. Many great poets have had problems to overcome. May you be one of them. Your observations remind me of all the things we did when we were young. I still remember the cold toes, the biting wind, etc. Not always just sheer joy. Your sitting by and observing also reminds me of Washington Roebling, son of the engeneer and designer and also an engineer, who helped build the Brooklyn Bridge. After working for long hours at high atmospheric pressure, he collapsed with decompression sickness and was partially parayzed. He continue supervising the constrution of the bridge only through binoculars from his balcony, which was close enough to the counstrucition site.
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Aaron Tate 12 July 2008
You didn't just paint an image in my head, you hand carved a magnificeint day at the park out of stone into my brain. I must say for a moment there I actually wanted to outside, you worked my emotions. Excellent Write. Bravo please.
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Shelley L Baxter-stanley 08 September 2007
Cassy this poem had such visuals...they made me ((Smile)) and see all the activity in my minds eye.Thank you so much for the getaway at the pond... Great imagery and feeling went into this poem...I especially liked how you said there were those helping others as they would their little sister...(Great insight) ...a neat way of describing someone being helpful and kind to someone. Please don't call yourself a cripple...we are all impaired in some ways sometimes physically, some poeple emotionally and with the insight and talent you have for writing you could never call yourself that...no one should we all have our gifts and weakness.Thank God U have eyes to appreciate the beauty of that moment at that pond... Wishing you all that is good.Health, Happiness and unexpectated ((Smiles)) ... =Shelley= Ten out of 10! !
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Flame6203E . 28 August 2007
wow great poem but did u make that crippe art up or is it true?
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Random Crap 22 August 2007
A really good poem, but so sad =(
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