Shahzia Batool

Bronze Star - 2,258 Points (Pakistan)

My Scattered Thoughts I - Poem by Shahzia Batool

Did I ever say I'm always right when I never was?

Should I blame others when I could not understand myself?

I'm a piece of jigsaw puzzle

which can never fit into any frame.

I don't know why do I always get failed in telling what I feel…

Am I wrong if I wish to be liked for what I am,

And not for what you like me to be?

Why do I excommunicate myself

when get angry with the world?

Am I the criminal most wanted,

or the hated judge though I never did crime or passed any judgement?

God! Save me from my getting lost in the dark…

Would it be difficult for me to get rid of the pain that lasts,

The thing that hurts,

The flame that burns?

I am neither Cleopatra nor the queen-bee,

But why then when no cries were heard

And no blood was spilled

Even then the soul got crucified?

The cemetery is the peacefullest place I've ever seen

With so much life

Lying scattered, entombed…
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Long before I've left the deception of knowing myself! ! !

Comments about My Scattered Thoughts I by Shahzia Batool

  • (1/22/2014 2:49:00 AM)

    long before i have left the deception of knowing myself.
    knowing oneself. most difficult assignment in the world of demands and hopes.
    ''jis ny apny nafs ko pehchana, os ny apny Rab ko pehchan''.
    I think, it is me i cant trust. It is me i am deceiving. It is me i am fed up. It is me the hidden enemy.
    Very sad, very real, very beautiful.
    (Report) Reply

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  • Bri Edwards (9/14/2013 3:49:00 PM)

    Shahzia, i especially liked (at least partially agreed with) the comments by Don Ketchy and Unwritten Soul.

    and Robert Green wrote: An Amazing, insightful poem Shahzia, this poem must eel(sic) what every thinking human being on this plant(sic) must feel, think all the time. Maybe as we are just about to be interned*** we will know our own inscription for our tombstone. i don't feel the feeling portrayed in this poem all the time, and probably feel it rarely, if at all. i consider myself lucky in this respect. others may think me weird (and a few have called me that!) . as for my is a nice idea, if we weren't running out of space and resources to indulge in the luxuries of burial and tombstones. yes, cemeteries are peaceful and a good place to go birdwatching at times, but i may rather want my body left out for vultures to dispose of as i've heard has been done in some societies. we DO have vultures here in california. hmmmmmmmm? thanks for sharing. well-written. bri

    ***rather than interned, i believe R. Green meant interred (i didn't catch that at first reading....and i also misspelled weird the first time. even we great poets are fallible. and i misspelled fallable(sic) the first time.) ha!

    past tense: interred; past participle: interred

    place (a corpse) in a grave or tomb, typically with funeral rites.
    he was interred with the military honors due to him


    Am I wrong if I wish to be liked for what I am,
    And not for what you like me to be? .........NO! But i think you are wrong/foolish if you EXPECT TO BE or INSIST UPON BEING liked for what you are rather than for what others like you to be.

    AND: Long before I've left the deception of knowing myself! ! ! ..........i can't be sure what is meant by this line. written as it is, it seems to be the end of a sentence or the beginning of a sentence, and NOT a complete thought. BUT if you put a comma after Long before......then you make it into a sentence which to me means that long ago/a long time ago you gave up the deception of feeling you knew yourself. :)
    (Report) Reply

  • Heather Wilkins (5/26/2013 11:20:00 AM)

    we are all different but in so many ways we are all the same Shahzia this is beauitfullwritten with a lot of insight and emotion (Report) Reply

  • Besa Dede (5/2/2013 10:17:00 PM)

    Very deep poem dear Shahzia! You amaze me with the simplicity with which you write... yet, your thoughts are full of insight and truthfulness. And I do agree with Walterran Sally when she says that each of us can find a piece of self amongst your lines. Thank you for describing them so nakedly truthful.
    Best wishes,
    (Report) Reply

  • (4/18/2013 11:46:00 PM)

    Each can find himself somewhere ‘mongst the enlightening lines. What an “epiphany” this poem is. Well done Shahzia. (Report) Reply

  • Lasoaphia Quxazs (4/18/2013 6:45:00 AM)

    Dear Shahzia, just know that we are all different, we all have a built in feeling. What we are, we are. When you find who you are you will know the truth, that you are wonderful as you are. Do not care who wants what, and when you love yourself as you are, it will not be necessary that others would approve you. (Report) Reply

  • Lyn Paul (4/13/2013 12:30:00 PM)

    Blaming...Why? So many questions. Cemeteries too me to are incredibly peaceful. Well written (Report) Reply

  • (4/12/2013 5:38:00 AM)

    Yes, when we leave our self-deception within the graveyard of self judgement...we are truly free to be our soul's divine purpose. Wonderful write dear Shahzia! (Report) Reply

  • (4/12/2013 4:31:00 AM)

    An amazing piece of work: -) (Report) Reply

  • (4/11/2013 1:57:00 PM)

    Fascinating and insightful!
    Excellent, Shahzia!
    (Report) Reply

  • Yasmin Khan (4/8/2013 1:08:00 PM)

    dandelion thoughts...the discovery that we do not know ourselves is a step towards self-knowledge, paradoxically. (Report) Reply

  • Valsa George (4/8/2013 11:33:00 AM)

    Am I wrong if I wish to be liked for what I am,
    And not for what you like me to be?
    A very pertinent question, we all tend to ask. We cannot be another person, always to plese others. With the over running tone of pathos and melancholy, this poem goes deep into our psyche and leaves a tugging effect! Thanks for the nice comment!
    (Report) Reply

  • (2/27/2013 7:32:00 AM)

    The loss of illusive sketches of identity is here a poetic license and Shahzia, you have enjoyed a luxurious charm of encountering life in all its entity.
    A good poem indeed. Sorry for not reading earlier... [As you may know I am now rebuilding my home page as I got the old homepage deleted from the PH due to a technical error.]
    (Report) Reply

  • (2/25/2013 3:16:00 AM)

    go's an engrossing journey one needs to embark upon at some point or the other. go on, my friend, go on! (Report) Reply

  • Sanjay Mehta (2/25/2013 1:07:00 AM)

    A sequel to your scattered thoughts:


    Bheedh ke is sailab main
    Sab jahan hai
    Kya hum wahan hain
    Hum jahan hai
    Sab wahan hai.

    Bheedh ke is sailab main
    Tum kahan ho
    Sab jahan hai
    Tum jahan ho
    Sab wahan hain.

    Bheedh ke is sailab mein
    Hum dundhte hain humko
    Is sailab main
    Tum dhundte ho tumko
    Is sailab main
    Sab dhundte hain sabko
    Is sailab main
    Hum kahan hain
    Tum kahan ho
    Is sailab main.
    (Report) Reply

  • Don Ketchy (2/24/2013 2:11:00 PM)

    These questions will continue to form an essential part of all who is still alive. Not to be completely answered or given an answer that is comforting... if life is however to be lived from the dictates of others, we would be busy going around in circles... what moves us forward is because we dare to walk no matter how uncomfortable the questions, a time comes to shrug the shoulders and let if fall by the wayside because there is something much greater ahead of all of us that beckons us...a wonderful insight this... I am indeed blessed to know you...I (Report) Reply

  • Tribhawan Kaul (2/21/2013 10:32:00 AM)

    Very powerful though little pessimistic depiction of sentiment through words pouring out feelings of hurt, anguish and seclusion inflicted by life through various internal and external forces. This life is full of challenges and one has to confront it with a one’s all strength not allowing evil designs to overpower. This poem is breathtaking one. The life is full of challenges. It gives one pain and happiness without realizing its effect. Happiness passes swiftly whereas the pain seems to tick away too slowly to our comfort….. God! Save me from my getting lost in the dark…is a line in which the poet sees hope yet God also help those who help themselves as each bad situation can be overcome by our determination, mental strength and the resolve to face the odds with courage and conviction.
    (Report) Reply

  • Soulful Heart (2/20/2013 11:50:00 PM)

    simply amazing....... catching the essence of lost identity........ (Report) Reply

  • (2/20/2013 4:19:00 AM)

    a very poignant poem, , just wish and pray this poem to be never autobiographical. but yes, the plethora of question, self-doubts, dilemmas, are quite human, there is intense pessimism in teh closing lines of teh poem, there is a sense of resignation, and why? ? the last line ' long before....' is so pregnant with philosophical overtone, the reader is left brooding on the mysteries of life as he takes a long pause on the last line, , thanx, , , the poetess has collected the scattered thoughts to compose a whole and complete body of a beautiful poem, [ i know i can never match the critical and creative faculties of Shahzia, who fathoms into the soul of the poems she reads and comments, she has such a huge range of study and understanding, her comments are many a times more beautiful and enlightening than the poems she picks up to read and encourage the poets here in poem hunter, ] (Report) Reply

  • Unwritten Soul (2/19/2013 5:10:00 PM)

    You always can be you with your own thought and how you drive yourself to be, because it's your life and if somebody try to maneuver your own life like their style, never allow it because their will color you with not real Shahzia identity, no matter what you are the painter of your world to paint all things you wanted it to be...But let people suggest you the idea But NO way to tell you what you must paint because you are your own artist and have your own vision. people will let you down when they are failed to lead you some way but you will never leave your life like that because its yours. so dont mind people just do your life as your own. Dont compare Cleopatra with you because you has no less than you to be compared...every life has a comparison okay! just stick to be who you are_Soul (Report) Reply

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Poem Submitted: Sunday, February 17, 2013

Poem Edited: Friday, March 15, 2013

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