Chocolates And Tears And Crazy Years Poem by duncan wyllie

Chocolates And Tears And Crazy Years

Rating: 4.1


What about tonight I said?
The big box in the window
My mum is short on money again
I feel that it's a sin though

We'll go tonight,
Stand outside shops
You’re on guard
Incase of cops

I burst through the door
Elderly couple, surprise
Fall from step what a blunder
Grab the box noise like thunder

Turn to see if couples gaining
Disbelief, faces remaining
Turn handle wrong way
Fight with it until I stray

Where's my school friend lookout
Half way up the hill
Wait for me I start to shout
Couple, still at till

We ran and ran, fools us both, up hill
Regret and relief set in
My Mothers Birthday tomorrow
Regret and relief turn to sorrow

Next morning I awake
To see mum eat evidence
How could you afford such a gift?
I feel it’s far from providence

Oh if I could turn back the clock
And tell that boy 'No Way'
Or teach about a conscience
That might keep him from going astray.

COMMENTS OF THE POEM
Charles Chaim Wax 30 January 2006

a fine poem subtle and complicated the need to give balanced by the urge to take all done with a smile and a bit of wisdom to end this wonderful narrative

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Lawrence S. Pertillar 30 January 2006

An introspective from a time where our intentions seem to be correct, however...our minds seem to be on another when the deed is done! I got several images from this, Duncan! I enjoyed reading this. L

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Mary Nagy 30 January 2006

Aww, I don't know whether you would deserve a hug......or a spankin'. :) This is very sweet Duncan, even though you were stealing, your heart was in the right place. Very nice. Sincerely, mary

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Shannon Chapel 30 January 2006

Duncan, It was the title that caught my eye (it's fabulous, by the way) , but the tale itself is what held me. This is a great piece of work, Duncan. A 10 from me. Shannon

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Ernestine Northover 31 January 2006

A criminal mind Eh! ! ! A great story from way back, and one that sticks in the mind for a very long time. Nifty poem. Love Ernestine XXX

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Karen Sinclair 19 July 2012

gorgeous, made me see a Hovis lad sneaking through the shop door, a bitter sweet write tyvm...karen

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David Gerardino 17 February 2012

very good, dungan, i can see your words........................

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Andrew Blakemore 30 July 2009

A great write Duncan, a wonderful story containing a moral message. We all know that it's wrong to steal and yet this case is tempered by the fact that he did it out of love for his mother. Best wishes, Andrew

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Cindy Kreiner Sera 01 June 2009

A wonderful write Duncan - it was done for the right reason not self gain - you did pay a price - fear! Mum enjoyed her gift - I would forgive you

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Duh Huh 30 March 2009

I like your poem, when we are young, we make our mistakes even when we are old we make our mistakes, but at least when we are young we have an excuse lol. Your poem took me to when i was a child, my bro and i would get in trouble and he would stay away from my mom all day till she forgot, i would just go in and take my punishment so i could enjoy the rest of my day lol. :) very well done, thank you for sharing.

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