JOSE MURGUIA

Fatherless Child.

fatherless child,
rainy days and no smile,

fatherless child,
filled with tribulations and trial,

fatherless child,
always running wild,

fatherless child,
i know one day you will smile.


01/02/2009
Copyright ©2009 Jose Murguia

Poem Submitted: Friday, January 2, 2009
Poem Edited: Saturday, February 21, 2009

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Comments about Fatherless Child. by JOSE MURGUIA

  • Anand Madhukar (9/20/2009 6:31:00 AM)

    An economy of words heightens the impact of this touching write.

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  • Lexa Love (9/18/2009 2:08:00 PM)

    This poem is really touchin........I LOVE it! !

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  • Yacov Mitchenko (9/4/2009 8:21:00 AM)

    Endearing childlike simplicity in the phrasing. Well done.

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  • The Grandmother is Watching (3/8/2009 7:21:00 PM)

    With a format like this,
    It is easy to do too much.

    You did a great job with succint phrasing.

    =]

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  • Trice Mcgettigan (3/2/2009 9:01:00 AM)

    that was a great poem..i liked it alot..and the poem just flowed very nicely

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  • Fire Frog (2/22/2009 8:35:00 PM)

    Great work. I could feel the emotions with-in your poem.

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  • Alesha Garrett (2/22/2009 1:08:00 PM)

    wow. I dont know my father & i wont. U need to just live your life freely.

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  • Dr John Celes (2/14/2009 3:53:00 AM)

    Jose,
    no one in this world is fatherless or motherless or spouseless for, God is our everything! Things will bw fine if only we listen to His calls and keep His codes.good, short poem.
    dr john celes

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  • Kerli Undead (2/7/2009 3:22:00 PM)

    for a short peom, people may think of it as that,
    but if you read it with emotion, this peom gives off a deep feeling, and thast what peoms should do, try to give off some feeling, which your peoms usually do,
    great job.

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  • Eric Adams (2/2/2009 7:56:00 AM)

    short sweet and to the point great poem man

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  • The painted smile clown. (1/29/2009 1:19:00 AM)

    thats reli good. i completely understand what your going thro and it makes the poem seem like its coming from somewhere dep in my head which i normally try to forget about. thats a reli deep poem. wel done :)

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  • Karen PaleroKaren Palero (1/16/2009 1:01:00 AM)

    i like the optimism you've marked in the last line..nice..!

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  • C. P. SharmaC. P. Sharma (1/15/2009 10:49:00 PM)

    I loved the positivity in the lines:

    fatherless child,
    i know one day you will smile.
    CP

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  • Arik Carpenter (1/15/2009 9:08:00 PM)

    short but very good, ., ., i love simple stuff the best

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  • Ivor Hogg (1/14/2009 4:18:00 PM)

    Simple but effective in getting your message across

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  • Dr. Kolitha Lelwala (1/14/2009 3:18:00 PM)

    Nicely penned with a hope at the end. Well, some one has to go into the situation to feel how painful to be without the father. May your compassion bless him.

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  • Genesis Learny (1/11/2009 10:11:00 PM)

    i like this poem because it carries the burden of the child who is hurting inside due to the abscence of male influence but at the same time it uplifts that child's spirit with simple hope for a smile upon the child's face.

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  • Vanessa Svaleson (1/9/2009 7:44:00 PM)

    i wish i could smile but i truely have no Father

    but that gives hope thanks it very good

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  • laela private (1/7/2009 10:17:00 PM)

    so view words and yet so powerful. it shows the tremendous need to have a father or fatherfigure in someones life. great job.

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  • Cierra Odom (1/7/2009 8:51:00 PM)

    that ones wonderful! ! ! ! ! ! those are great rhyming tec

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