I know it was a dream but still it felt so real.
My dad was right here next to me, his arms I can still feel.
He asked me how I'm coping and if I felt alright.
I cried and tried to tell him ''Dad, I'm just so sad tonight.''
I told him of my lonliness and of my crazy fears.
I told him all the things he's missed with me throughout the years.
He said that he had been here, he knew just how I felt.
He said that he was proud of me and by my bed he knelt.
He prayed for my forgiveness for all the pain I had.
All I could do was hold him and say ''I'll always love you Dad.''
He sat in the recliner that was always left for him.
He watched until I fell asleep but left the lights on dim.
He whispered in my ear ''I'll always be around''.
I woke up disappointed...an empty chair was all I found.
The air was thick with his cologne. I heard him call my name.
Since last night I know for sure I'll never be the same.
Mary...this is one of your strongest and best poems. I love the detail about his cologne, and his praying for you was very moving. For me, the rhyme gets in the way, however. It draws me out, causes me to think about the sounds at the ends of the lines rather than the guts of the poem. I know that they are part of your technique for generating ideas, and I do it myself from time to time, especially in the last two lines of a poem, but they can become more like static than music disturbing the spell of the poem. Just a thought.
Mary, I think I was crying from the first two lines forward!
This was such a lovely meeting with your father, Mary, very poignant and moving. Lovely one. Sincerely Ernestine
a very poignant, effective poem! . By coincidence, I have just submitted a poem on the same theme....
Dear Mary I know about that lost feeling as far as my father is concerned.He left home when I was 18 months old and I believe that this changed everything.My thoughts are with you.Love Duncan
that poem truely grabs the reader and makes you think. The fact that my father is gone makes me wAnt to sit and think deeply. This poem makes me establish a true emotion. I'm honustly speechless. But to get to the point this is GREAT! ! !
Excellent, heartfelt poem inspired by the thought of Jack, no doubt. Possibly skip the 'was all I' it would improve the meter. Best H
To some extent the sentiment here is similar to my 'Cheese and Pickles' This is nota ploy to get you to read my work but the analogy is worth a moment's perusal
Oh Mary this is such a moving poem, I can hardly see the screen to type. Beautifully written. Amanda x
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
Oooo... I like this subject matter. I definitely believe this.