The Fall From Grace Poem by ONElia AVElar

The Fall From Grace

Rating: 3.6

...In perpetual drive,
with serpentine motions,

till you get in the capsule
of Adam's embrace.

Inside it only, preserved you'll keep
your girlish beauty and youthful grace,

hissed the snake to Eve once
and slipped back in the grass...


Kesav Easwaran 28 September 2008

a different outlook on conjugation... purely feminine...has a right of course... write graceful enough and good 10

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Paolo Giuseppe Mazzarello 28 September 2008

The original sin: variations on the theme. A sort of theatre in a relived and reinvented plot. A feeling of melancholy more than guilt. We haven't read Onelia's poems for some time, we read it with pleasure.

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Ashraful Musaddeq 29 September 2008

Beautiful. How we came into......10+

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Ivan Donn Carswell 01 October 2008

the reasoning is impeccable - but what gender is the snake? There seems to be an underlying assumption of complicity at work here... An expressly feminine rationalisation. Beautifully posited. Rgds, Ivan

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Original Unknown Girl 02 October 2008

A beautiful succinct message. The moral is clear for all to interpret. Love the title too... another fabulous penning dear One. HG: -) xx

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Janice Windle 03 December 2008

Subtle, layered truths, beautifully set out in your inimitable voice, Onelia.

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Dr Kamran Haider 12 October 2008

It took me a little time to grasp the whole of it... Great work of art... Here you are at the pinnacle of creativity... Keep it up... I think 10 is not enough for this poem, as it can't be measured in numbers or any known unit... :)

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Vidyadhar Durgekar 10 October 2008

Beautiful write.I enjoyed reading it..........

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Jerry Hughes 09 October 2008

Totally agree with my old mate Ivan, a stunningly simple concept well worth a mention.

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Donall Dempsey 05 October 2008

What a delicious concept to bite into! I believe that Eve is more sinned against than the fantastic futuristic ending that is the beginning of the beginning! Succinct and makes one think and then think...again. love Dónall Dónall

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