Pensive about those people
I am hushed with shock
Their beliefs becoming cripple
In life, growing dark
Paupers embellishing grieved huts
In the neck of the woods
Illicit sites, awfully unswept
Kids being beggars in childhoods
Overwhelmed by superstitions,
Immensely necessitous for money
In their visions,
Beg, eat and don't worry
Nabbed by critical misery
Bearing nil aim for life
Ignorance, the very cause of poverty
In pauper's society, peace cann't survive
Drowning in the flood of illiteracy
I year for soon they'll cluntch at a straw
Yet indocrination is the first priority
'Only aware countries evolve'Tis nature's law
Before long, the Sun of fortunes
Aggrandizes with lavished energy
Its heat will scorch all the sins
Pauperism, will meet death ultimately
I am glad to know about your concern for the poor, the disadvantaged class of the society. The poem adequately expresses the feelings of your tender heart. The problem is not easy to eradicate. Spread of education and establishment of moral values will help ease the situation, but first of all, the politicians of the country must decide what type of a country they would like to build and they would like to be a part of. The note could be curtailed to add to the meaning and the theme of the poem. However, I liked the following part of your note: in my country people having degrees are siiting on shops and those with forged degrees are sitting in conference rooms. I hope, after attaining requisite educational qualification, you will find a way to involve yourself in some efforts to ameliorate the condition of this unfortunate section of the society. I appreciate your poem.
A hardhitting poem so nice on d poverty stricken, u r right they shud work not beg. Pls coment on my latest imaginary poem
i'll start with a spelling correction. : Drowing in the flood of illiteracy.....Drowning....there are several other mistakes in spelling but i won't mention them unless you ask me to mention them. perhaps Drowing is just a silly mistake in the typing, but i suggest to all poets that they proofread for errors before submitting poems. of course i sometimes proofread and miss a mistake of my own. i read the background information on the poet, the poem, and the poet's notes. Hira, i do wish you good luck, especially in making your country better (including helping more people to support themselves without begging.....even though i do not agree that all people can succeed through their own effort) , and in making it easier for girls/women to be as free as boys/men. my country, america, has made a lot of improvement in this last area in the last hundred years. thanks for sharing. and your english is very good, assuming it is not your first language!
great message, beautiful rhymes and of course good poem great job
A poet is he, who feels and then expresses it in a beautiful and impressive manner. You have these qualities.
A well thought poem expressing the concern for poor & illiterate people's misery, what did touch the heart.
A well elaborated poem about the poor & illiterate people's misery. And ultimately the deep concern for them which touches heart.
your poem is important from the angle of a deep thought-process in this tender age... spellings and grammar areas are important too for the grooming, we all should focus on it, but i give you the credit for your serious approach more than everything else! ! ! very good! ! !
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
Thank you so much Sir for encouraging :) I am delighted