Rookie (15 january)

Not Ready For Goodbye - Poem by IBRAHIM SUMAYYA

Ibrahim Sumayya


Skeletons in your closet
Time to time you get yourself knocked down
In promises you could never keep
Life is playing you a game of chess
Everything falls out from under you
Fears are becoming reality
You’re literally scared to death
Obviously there was something sweet before
You just didn’t care to appreciate it
The times you put tears on my face
Pools of sorrow in my soul
I'm possibly doing everything to cut your memory into little pieces
You don’t belong in my shelter any more
No longer have the legal right to stay in my heart

The problem is all inside your head
Scaring enough to make you complain
Fate is conspiring against you
Tears have been your food day and night
Every day and every night goes on with endless apologies
Every minute on earth brings you closer to pain
Is this the way it feels when you’re regretting
Nobody warned you that it would be this frustrating
You didn’t look anything like this
I didn’t know that you could get this crazy
Don’t tell me you’re now seeing life through the eyes
Of that someone you totally crushed?
So many years
You took me for granted
But now you seem to understand how much I meant to you
I guess you don’t even know really where to begin
I have to admit it is a constant struggle
It’s been a while since we connected
You’re not ready for goodbye

We may be done
But it won’t stop there
Tears and apologies
Surely isn't the way to win any votes in your favor
Every now and then without warning
Unexpected things happen
Break down those barriers
Every time you fall
Always be there to collect yourself
Get a sensible plan to help you get back on your feet?
Take the responsibility to pick up the pieces
You can change things

Gathering my thoughts
Looking deep everywhere inside me
The more I think about the more I want to let you in
It hurts too much to know that the road
I’m thinking of taking is too risky
It is better to know I cannot make us last
You're the only one I wish I could forget
But every time I close my eyes I see your face
Don’t want to admit that I’m unable to move past this feeling
I loved every minute I spent with you
With every beat of my heart
I have tried to see the truth, but
Eyes are foolishly blinded
I’m afraid you could get this sentence shortened
Can’t stop thinking about trying to see past all your faults
I hate this feeling inside
That keeps bringing my thoughts back to you
Those old hurts still burn so fiercely

The question to my mind is this,
Why I still want to be with you?
Because I’m not ready for goodbye
When I said I hate you
What I really meant was that I still love you
I’m seeking a place within you
A place with peace and serenity
I will drown in you one more time
I guess there’s still light inside
This second chance doesn't mean anything
If you haven't learned from the first one
I think there will be no more crying and pain
I hope this love will be a promise of a lifetime of togetherness
We don't know how to live without each other
We never want to let us go
We not ready for goodbye
Together in the sweetest space
Let the future take control

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Poem Submitted: Wednesday, January 22, 2014

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